Author: Roshonda B

My name is Roshonda Blackmon and I have been known in life as “the encourager” God gave me that gift before I even realized what it was or what it truly meant, the only thing I knew is that a vast amount of people liked to come to me for advice and once that advice was received, I never heard from them anymore until they wanted more advice. That gifting soon became my ministry. I’ve been through quite a bit of challenges in life from dealing with suicide, low self-image which resulted in low self-esteem, to the difficulties of growing up in a one parent household and the list goes on and on. But God in all his Mercy and Grace blessed me to overcome those obstacles and situations and gave me a “second” chance by allowing me to live through all that darkness in order to help spread an encouraging light to others. In a world of uncertainty and negatism’s I want to encourage you to LIVE. Yes, Life does get hard sometimes, But if we keep looking up at the SON; we gain strength, we become empowered and we grow in the process with God’s help; for it doesn’t matter where you are in your life at this moment in time; God is able and will meet you within that dark place and change your life from Dark to Light, I’m not only a witness to this; but JustsumInspiration to show you, That you too can make it.

19+ Things to Think, Do & Achieve in 2019

Published on January 3, 2019April 18, 2019 by Roshonda B3 Comments

Well, 2019 is officially here ready or not. WHOOMP, here it is! Remember that song by a group named Tag Team?? If you do please don’t blame me for that anthem swimming around in your head today, My Bad….

However, So what are your resolutions for this year? If you’re like me and I just got this way like a little over a year ago, I threw making resolutions out of the window. This is probably why this muffin top of a waist of mine has decided to make itself a permanent home. HA HA – I’m really going to work on that this year….

Anywho, whether you still do or believe in resolutions or even achieve them. I thought this year would be great to ditch the resolutions (again, in my case) and let’s think about how we want to think, what we want to do and simple things we can actually achieve for ourselves, without feeling so guilty when 2020 arrives, okay yes I know right now that’s far-fetched but did you see how 2018 left us like Justin Timberlake left *NSYNC or maybe a little more current like Toni Braxton just left Birdman a.k.a Cash Money? So yeah, you really can’t put off tomorrow what we are going to do this year….Okay??

I came up with 19 things because, well we’re in 2019 and there’s A LOT of ground to cover mentally, spiritually and physically. So, Let’s Get right to it shall we??

LET’S THINK MORE:

Positively – No matter what, try to find the good in every situation. I promise it’s there.
Wisely – Let’s try to think before we speak, my mouth has gotten me into more trouble than I care to say and let’s not even talk about my emotions that drives the get-away car. The bible says, a soft answer turns away wrath but grievous words stir up anger. Tell your emotions to give you the keys….
Thoughtfully – Let’s think more about someone else than ourselves.
Maturely – I know this is hard but sometimes you have to be the bigger person in a situation, even if it means saying you’re sorry first.
Responsibly – you know what this means…lol
Unapologetically – having/living without regrets

LET’S DO MORE:

Exercises, Exercise, Exercise – If you haven’t been to the gym in ages (like me…hehe) then you don’t want to go out the gate committing to working out an hour or more a day….That won’t happen. A little bit a day goes a long way….trust me! (5-10min is a great start!)
Picking Better Food Choices – Getting fresh meals delivered to your house every week is truly ideal (I may have to check into this later) however; it’s not affordable for everyone. So Instead, start small. It may be adding green beans instead of fries to a meal and/or opting for the side salad instead of the fries for a burger or picking up an apple or orange instead of the cookies out of the vending machine at work (preaching to the choir here, I’ve done it) Take Small steps towards health and soon….it’ll be a full commitment.
Things for ourselves – YASSSS!!! I mean this wholeheartedly. Ladies and Gents schedule a massage once a month or go get your nails, feet or hair done. Take some ME time for you, even if it means taking some time and going window shopping or getting an ice-cream cone. Even taking some time off work, not to run errands or do things for the kids but for YOU. Know how they say on an airplane cover your nose before anyone else’s? – Yes, Exactly…..YOU FIRST!
Calendars on Our phones – Use It! Soooo, let me just say I know all of our phones should have a calendar on them and that’s great if you use them. I noticed last year that my brain had failed me in remembering quite a few things – a friend then asked me, why don’t you use the calendar on your phone?? I know this might sound silly or juvenile but that calendar has been a lifesaver! We get new phones and sometimes don’t use half of the stuff on them…I don’t know if you do it or not, but make use of your phone calendar and it has reminders, so there’s no excuse to miss those very important appointments.
Say I Love You! – OMGosh, we don’t say this enough. Practice not only telling yourself this but others as well. LOVE IS THE KEY!
Take Chances – We miss many of the chances we don’t take. Take more chances
Forgive…..Need I say more?

LET’S ACHIEVE MORE:

Dust it OFF – You don’t even have to tell me, everyone has something that they put on the back burner to be written, explored or tackled for later and that later ended or ends up being 2yrs long….whatever it is, dust it off and put yourself on a timeframe to get it done (For me? Book #2 is on the dust it off list, what’s on yours?)
Travel – In my mind, there are A LOT of places that I go too – only for them to be just that…stuck and lived out in my mind; have you been there? This year, plan to go on that long-awaited trip – even if it’s a hike…..travel someplace you’ve never been. I’m actually working on getting my passport and visa to travel to Africa or Russia this year….fingers crossed. Let’s hope my wallet is favorable = )
Social Media what you Say? – Okay, we all love social media and in this world (maybe this should’ve gone under the DO MORE tab) however, I feel as though we all could use a needed break from social media. It’s amazing because once I scroll and look at one pic or statement – next thing you know an hour or two has passed by and I’m tired. An hour or two lost that could’ve been used on something productive (like the Dust if Off bit above)
Take Some Classes – whether you want to cook better, learn how to ballroom dance, do pottery, take those much needed business classes or even if you want to learn how to crochet (not my thing and I tried it…lol) whatever it is you want to do, Nike says “Just Do It” I say “Just Take It” let’s be more adventurous this year, speaking of which….
MeetUps Anyone? – Last year I signed up to do a meetup with a group of writers who were supposed to meet at our local library here in town every week, needless to say – it didn’t work out as the library had not heard of such a group….anywho, there are plenty of meetup activities and places to go and get involved in, you just have to look for them and it depends on what you like or want to do – trust me, there’s a meetup for it. Check it Out!!
Go to the Movies and not on your Couch! – Yes, I do I do I do LOVE the Redbox and enjoy watching a movie in, rather than out. But going out to the movies over the holiday season with my two kids (We saw Bumblebee – Awesome movie by the way!! – Thanks Mallory for the gift card) was a joy. It allowed us to get out of the house and enjoy some fresh air as well as popcorn with everyone else, it was a good outing and I loved seeing an even bigger screen.

And Last but Not Least

JUST BE TRUE TO BEING YOU!!! NOTHING MORE, NOTHING LESS.

Life is short, don’t let another year go by without living yours out loud!!!

So, how was your holiday! And what are you thinking, planning or achieving this year!!

See Ya Soon! Roshonda =)

Have You Seen Them on YTUBE?? – The Holiday CHILLLLLL Mode Is ON!!

Published on November 21, 2018April 18, 2019 by Roshonda B4 Comments

The photo above courtesy of Pexels

This week will be a fun post of my favorite YTUBERS in which I feel as though everyone should follow and with the holidays around the corner as we feast on turkey, dressing (I’m from the south, so that’s what we call it =) and giblet gravy…once we spend that quality fun with family and friends, laughing – talking and of course going back for those delicious seconds, We’re on our phones directly right after!!

Whether you’re catching up with the family who couldn’t make it down to the coveted family feast or watching Netflix and chilling or YTUBING to some of us our phones are like our second family, or first in most cases. So, as you settle into the couch to take a load off those feet and let your tummy digest all that good home cooking you’re going to stuff it with, I thought it’d be nice to check out a couple of my fav YTUBERS and who knows, you may even like them so much to follow them too.

And No, I didn’t forget about my NETFLIX family – Listed below, I’ll have a couple of movies I watched or will be watching over the holiday break that was/are really, really good and speaking of chillaxing (does anyone say that anymore…lol)

I’ll also have some of the most popular posts of the year below as well. These posts received the most likes/views this year so just in case you missed it – you can catch them below and get your read on as well during this “joyful” season.

Oh and just in case you missed the post on last week “Dysfunctional Family & the Holiday Blues” this will be my very last post of the year. I’ll be taking a break from blogging and social media during this time and using that space and time to relax, renew, refresh and hopefully come up with some new and fresh topics for next year.

MY FAV YTUBERS

Roll with Cole & Charisma

I absolutely love this couple; they’re so sweet and fun to watch. Cole is a quadriplegic that became paralyzed when he fell on a rock during a diving accident with his friends. It’s been a long road for Cole but he’s strong and has an equally strong woman by his side named Charisma who aids in loving as well as helping him. Together, the couple goes on amazing adventures to show that love really does conquer all. I love them and you will too – check them out!

KevOnStage

To say Kev is funny would be an understatement, this guy is HILARIOUS!!! Kev is a Christian comedian who takes videos and talks and/or re-enacts what’s going on in the video. Kev focuses on positivity, enlightenment, and encouragement. I promise you’ll love him and crack up in the process.

Jordan Matter

Jordan is a phenomenal photographer who takes snapshots in weird yet crazy photos in the middle of nowhere “sometimes” and while his places of choice may seem a little risqué the photos he produces from it are a sight to SEE, literally. Follow Jordan as he gets with celebrities and locals to take they are *phenomenal* only Jordan can do it, snapshots.

WillieMooreJr

This guy right here – words can’t describe. Willie Moore Jr. is an actor, comedian, producer, speaker, radio show host and a Christian R&B artist and minister. Willie Moore Jr and his wife Patricia are a blended family who co-wrote the book “Happily After All” – How to keep your relationship going when you are tired of trying. He’s also famous for saying “Flatout” or “I’ma keep it 100” – I love his short-clipped inspirational video’s on life, love and just random thoughts that make you think. Go check him out – I promise you’ll be glad you did.

I also follow alotttttttttttt of natural hair videos as well…such as

Halfrican Beauty
OnlyoneJess
MsNaturallyMary
Chizi Duru
Nia Hope
The Chic Natural
Jane Nashe

So, if you’re a natural like me and need some good hair tips, tricks and/or styles – these ladies will serve you up a good dose.

MOVIES TO WATCH ON NETFLIX

I’m a HUGE, NO – I mean GIGANTIC! movie buff so I love movies especially suspense thrillers. While I talk about my bestie the “Redbox” all the time sometimes I don’t always feel like going out getting a movie and that’s where Netflix comes in at. The movies listed below are all movies that I’ve seen and felt as though you’d like them too.

Look them up on Netflix over the holiday break – I promise you’ll like them ALL!

Christian Mingle
When We First Met (too funny)
The Man in 3B
Amateur
Roxanne, Roxanne
Irreplaceable You (grab your tissues for this one!)
Fifty – a movie based in Lagos, Nigeria (really good!)
Sister Code
Gerald’s Game

Dysfunctional Family & The Holiday Blues =(

Published on November 15, 2018April 18, 2019 by Roshonda B10 Comments

The picture above courtesy of pexels

With Thanksgiving coming up next week, I thought I’d talk about family. The holidays are supposed to be the times in which we get together with family and laugh, talk, remanence, give thanks and most of EAT! But sometimes that’s not always easy, especially if you have dysfunctional family members or a MEMBER! which could make those holiday gatherings very uncomfortable.

There’s a quote that says, “Families are like fudge, mostly sweet with lots of nuts.” Does that sound like your family? Because let’s face it, we all have a family member or relatives who seem to have come from another planet than we did.

While we may all wish we can send them back for a replacement, they are still part of our family and despite the ups and downs that surround them, we have to deal with them and love them the same. I used to think that everyone had a good family except for me because we seemed to fight all the time and just when you thought everybody was getting along, something would come up out of nowhere.

It could be from something my mom said, my dad did, my sister thought or how I reacted, and the next thing we know, no one would pick up a phone for months on end.
As I got older, I realized that even the biggest families had issues and no family is perfect by any means and while my family was distant, there were other families who didn’t come together at all or allowed hatred to circle through them and build a fire that never ended.

We can’t save the world or help every dysfunctional family but listed below are a few tips to maybe keep the line of communication open with our estranged relatives before, during and after the holidays.

#1. Communicate regularly.

This may be very hard for some families because most of them have built up so many issues and have held onto so much hurt, that it’ll take several counseling sessions to get those layers pulled completely away. But I’ve found that most family situations can be solved if we can learn to talk to each other before a situation escalates out of control.

*At least you try to talk it out, even if they don’t want too*

Do your part, because at the end of the day, what YOU DID really will matter. If they choose not to conform, then you did your part – pray for them and move on. Hopefully, they’ll come around when they’re ready.

#2. Seek counseling from a family therapist.

If regular communication does not succeed, then counseling is the next step. Some dysfunctional family issues may have nothing to do with you per se, but it could have something to do with what an older family member did.

Issues could’ve already been in place prior to your birth, in which the family never settled among themselves, which caused division with other family members. Counseling helps to get us past the “Then” to help us be better for the “Now” and future family generations to come.

#3. Back off but not completely.

Most families feel that most fiery problems will resolve themselves by staying away, in most cases, this only makes matters worse and hatred increase. While situations may become too strong to handle and you may have to back off just to protect yourself, don’t allow it to stay that way.

Don’t let weeks, months, or even years keep you from being connected to your family unless you have been totally pushed away and in that case – it’s not your fault or problem but the individuals who closed the door without making amends.

#4. Forgiveness is key.

When you’ve made every attempt to bring about reconciliation, but find that there’s no effort on their part, then you have to forgive them and move on.
Forgiveness doesn’t excuse the behavior that dysfunction brings, but it allows us to learn from what happened and to let it go (in which is a process all by itself)

Remember, it’s not about what they did, what they said or what they haven’t done; it’s about what you do. Forgiveness is your pass to have peace for yourself not them.
∼∼∼∼∼∼
We cannot change our families, because we’re stuck with them forever. No matter what we think or how we feel about them, they are a part of us, and we are apart of them.
But you’ll find out that family no matter how dysfunctional it may be, is a really great addition to your life. It’s something that everyone dreams of having – even if it can’t be with their “natural” ones.

Okay, so BIG announcement. My next post will be on next Wednesday and will be my last post for the year. I know, I know – don’t cry……haha (I’m sure you’re not) Anywho, I’ll not only be taking a break from blogging but also social media as well. After next week, I won’t be posting anything until after the beginning of the year.

What will my last post be about??? You’ll have to see next week – hint, hint: it’s going to be light and informative (the fun informative =)

See Ya Next Week Friends!!

EnSpired: You Gotta Watch “BAO” By Domee Shi

Published on November 13, 2018April 18, 2019 by Roshonda B2 Comments

The photo above courtesy of damiadeniyi.com

Okay, so this post isn’t going to be long because I really want you to see this very inspiring, loving and (you betta get your tissues) video. Over the weekend I watched The Incredibles 2 with my son and daughter and it was really, really good. Let me just say “Jack-Jack” stole my heart and was the cutest and main character of the movie (to me at least)

It was fun, action-filled and let’s just say “Elastigirl” got her time in the spotlight but things aren’t always as good as they seem. We really have to “check” people’s motives for why they want us to do certain things – anywho, it’s a great movie that the whole family will love. While the movie was great – it was this video at the end that brought tears to my eyes a short-film by the name of “BAO”

Bao is a Chinese word in which means “dumpling” – it’s a delicacy that’s filled with meat or vegetables and then steamed/broiled. However, you may get another meaning once you see the film below. If you’re a parent, you’ll understand this and even if you’re not; It’ll take your mind back to your own childhood and put you in the shoes of how your parents must’ve felt when it came time to “letting you go so you can discover your own wings” The film was inspired by Chinese-Canadian Domee Shi . According to Shi, the story’s meaning came was inspired by her “overprotective” mother when she was growing up. The short film is one of the first directed by a woman for Disney Pixar.

maxresdefault — Domee Shi, Director/Creator of Disney Pixar Short Film – BAO

Okay, so I’m warning you again – you’re going to need some tissues for this one.

Watch the film and let me know what you think in the comments. Also, Incredibles 2 is now available at your local Redbox.

Just Say It ALREADY!!! GEEEZZZZ…

Published on November 8, 2018April 18, 2019 by Roshonda B12 Comments

The photo above courtesy of pexels

So, I’m going to start this post off by saying “I dislike me sometimes” – ever had that feeling where you get totally FED UP! with your own self?? As much as I would love to be the angel and say I’m TOTALLY – PERFECT!!! HAHA – TOTALLY NOTTTTT! I’m really, honestly, NOT!

I mean, sometimes I can dish it out and serve it up really nice on a glorious gold platter for everyone else, but when it comes to me following my own, let’s say….advice. I don’t always do it and that’s for good reason – most of the time, well let’s say 65% of the time – I’m fearful, prideful and afraid of how I’d look if I actually did it. The other 35% is me actually doing it.

Okay, so I know you’re probably saying “What the Heck is she talking about??” Glad you asked! So, I have a hard time – giving people compliments. I’m going to explain, hold on…because I can see you looking like, What???

You see?, If I see a lady and she’s dressed up really nice. I’ll say in my head, oh wow that’s a beautiful dress, earrings or I love her hair or that perfume smells good. I say all these things in my head and my head thinks it’s saying these things aloud but in all actuality it’s just me in my own head space. FEEL ME???

adult-attractive-beautiful-1036620 — *Pexels.com*

I hold those good vibes in because I’m afraid of the look I’ll get when I actually say it. I mean, in reality I’m a very outgoing person – I have an outgoing personality and I can talk to just about anyone but, for some reason I have a hard time giving people compliments – oh course, you’d understand why I wouldn’t say these things to a man. Although, there have been some men that I did want to compliment and say, hey – you look good today or I like that tie, those jeans, that shirt or you have a nice smile – especially if he’s wearing some good smelling cologne.

However, I regress from doing that unless I truly know the person – otherwise, I just look, smile and keep it moving and have that conversation in my head space only. I don’t want to seem disrespectful OR make it seem like I’m trying to make a pass at them andddd ok, I just get all weird about the situation. To make a very long scenario on both accounts very short – what I’m really trying to say is:

Why don’t we give compliments to others?”
Is this something that you have issues with doing?
Men?, If you’re reading this article – do you find it comfortable or weird complimenting the opposite sex??
Women?, do you find it uncomfortable complimenting the opposite sex?

I’m not saying that I don’t do it because I do – I just feel as though I should do it more often than I should. I say that because you never know what’s going on in a person’s head space or how they’re feeling. That woman that we fail to say “How nice she looks in that dress or how the color of it compliments her skin tone” may be just the thing she needs to hear, because maybe that morning when she put it on – she had self-doubt or some other negative feelings going on about it and you saying something nice, just may be the boost she needed to hear to let her know that she made the right clothing choice that morning. You know what I mean??

One day, while I was in Wal-Mart – which happens to be my favorite store in the whole wide world (And No, they are not sponsoring me…lol, I wish!!) As I was shopping in the produce section, I just happened to look up and seen this older woman. She had the most beautiful head of gray hair on her head and the style that it was in was just as beautiful. As I passed by her, I got this urge (like a very STRONG one) to tell her how nice her hair looked, okay – so in my head space I had already told her but then my brain kicked in and said “Girl, Really??” no you didn’t!!

I walked pass her and was trying to go down the other aisle but something kept pushing me to tell her how great her hair looked. So you know how we do – I walked over beside her and pretended like I was interested in some soy beans…(LOL)….my arms were sweaty, my heart was racing and then….finally…..

Listen below to hear the rest, haha – you know I got to make it interesting. So, did I tell her? or did I let fear take over and leave….take a listen & check it out!

It only takes one smile to offer welcome….and blessed be the person who will share it. It only takes one moment to be helpful….and blessed be the person who will spare it. It only takes one joy to lift a spirit….and blessed be the person who will give it. It only takes one life to make a difference….and blessed be the person who will live it.

Amanda Bradley

Weekly Announcements!!!

I was so honored and glad to be apart of a vendor event last weekend. Below is the table I had set up for it. Was super excited to make a couple of connections and talk briefly about bullying and how the message behind the book “Billy Wolf & The Kids of Heavenly Hills Elementary” impacted my own life and the reasoning for me writing it.

If you would like your very own copy, You can purchase it at one of the major retailers below. And please, when you do purchase – don’t forget to leave a review, it’s very much appreciated!