Hey, Everyone! Okay so before you ask – No, I’m officially not back yet…lol. However, do you miss me? I definitely miss you which is why I had to stick my head through the window. I’m still on hiatus, there’s a lot of things going on right now; however, with it being a new month and all, I was thinking about a FB live that I did 2 months ago and thought I’d share it with you.
It’s entitled “Finish The Assignment!” I was talking to the Lord about some things and before I could finish stating my case, this is what he told me. I don’t know how many of you have “unfinished business” that you have to do – maybe it’s a book, maybe it’s starting your own business, maybe it’s following your passion or finally completing something that you’ve put off on the back burner.
Whatever it is, 6 months have flown by and time is waiting on NO ONE! What are you going to do with the last 6 months of the year? Think about it and determine to FINISH what you started!
I pray this little video is an encouragement to you to pick up whatever it is you put down and FINISH IT because Time is waiting on NO ONE!
Talk to ya Soon!
P.S. Please excuse my hair – I should’ve left it down, it was definitely an in-between appointments stage…lol lol lol. (Oh Well, You can’t look like Angela Bassett all the time…he he)
So here we are, it’s 2019 and what do we do – where do we start – what new adventures will await us this year, what new experiences, what heartaches. Will we accomplish the ever so popular “New Year’s Resolution” we set forth every year, this year? Well, I don’t know about you – but I tend to not “stick” to the ever to faithful resolution, it’s out the window before February can say, Hi Beautiful!
Yes, Yes – It’s very true and while I can’t promise that I’d squash the goal of losing weight this year as I do every year (although I’m going to put forth a mighty good effort). There’s one thing over the holiday season that I did promise myself that I would do more of this year and that’s “passing the buck” or the load as you can say. It’s funny However, there’s one thing that I know I will be doing more of this year and that’s passing the BUCK!
This is one of those lessons that I should’ve actually learned a long, long, long time ago but I didn’t….some lessons come by “the hard way” That’s what my mom used to tell me growing up, she’d say “Sometimes, you have to learn the hard way” I never knew what she truly meant by those words, however; being an adult now and as I look back that’s how most of my “life lessons” were learned. THE HARD WAY..
I have a tendency of taking on too much and that’s too much of anything. Whether it’s something to do at work, church, the kids and so forth – for some reason I become superwoman and viola! I take it on and get it do!nn@nnn$eeenn*n…..??? Yes, I really did mean to type “done” that way, because that’s how my brain functions once I take on too many assignments, it gets a little crazy. Another thing I do, which goes in line with what I’m talking about here is “obligate” myself to toooooooooo many things. I say YES before I can give myself time to think it through and then find myself complaining in the midst of it as I’m swearing up and down that I am NEVER!! going to do it again….
Finally, one day I had to ask myself “Why do you do this?” and “Who are you doing this for?” is it to get people to like you or are you trying to network and make connections – because sometimes we do things out of the ordinary for those causes too. When I couldn’t come up with an appropriate answer for my madness. I finally started evaluating the reasons why I was doing what I was doing and I came to two conclusions:
1) I wanted to be liked and wanted people to feel as though they could count on me to do anything, even if I suffered at my own expense.
2) Having a lot of things going on made me feel as though I was really doing something good with my life.
Whew!! That Felt Good Letting Go….
Coming into this year, well months before this year. I decided that enough was enough and started either saying NO to things I know I can’t balance or and this may sound selfish to some of you – Building my own business and spending more time on “MY” projects. Are you a victim of not passing the buck? Well, listed below are a couple of tips to help you out!
Evaluate Your “Already” Spoken for TIME!
What do you have going on right now, that’s basically what this is saying. Before you commit to something – take a day and think about all the things you have going on in a day or a week and the times set aside to do those things.
Are you a Good Manager?
This sort of goes along with #1 but honestly ask yourself – are you focused and on top of the projects you’re already doing now? If you’re struggling with keeping up with your own things, then it’s probably not a good idea to take on someone else’s project or add more to your already dwindling list of things to do.
Please, Don’t Feel Bad….You Betta Not!
You know and I’m going to be transparent here, most times people think if they take on the world so to speak…it makes them look busy, it makes feel important and makes them look credible or reliable to others and the lie detector test determined that’s a lie! But hey, I used to be that girl too. Whether in church, on my job or favors for close friends, I always took on more than I could chew. While I felt important my body was saying otherwise…
Do you Care about Your Health?
Okay, picking up from the last tip….my stress level and blood pressure was through the roof! I knew I had taken on too much but I was too ashamed to say it or give it back because I felt as though it would not make me look credible. There’s a saying that says “If you die today, someone else will do your job tomorrow” and that’s the truth, most of the time before your body even gets cold; they already looking for someone else to fulfill the job….sad huh.
So, what I’m trying to say is – If you don’t have to do it, DON’T! If you have to much on your plate already? Just pass the Buck! This is a new year, sometimes we can spend so much time on other people’s projects (unless it’s a part of your business) until we forget our own. We become focused on stressing out over someone else’s dream, while ours is hanging out in the background.
Don’t let keeping the buck, affect your attitude, health or overall goals because this is your year to not get stuck, but to PASS THE BUCK!
Well, 2019 is officially here ready or not. WHOOMP, here it is! Remember that song by a group named Tag Team?? If you do please don’t blame me for that anthem swimming around in your head today, My Bad….
However, So what are your resolutions for this year? If you’re like me and I just got this way like a little over a year ago, I threw making resolutions out of the window. This is probably why this muffin top of a waist of mine has decided to make itself a permanent home. HA HA – I’m really going to work on that this year….
Anywho, whether you still do or believe in resolutions or even achieve them. I thought this year would be great to ditch the resolutions (again, in my case) and let’s think about how we want to think, what we want to do and simple things we can actually achieve for ourselves, without feeling so guilty when 2020 arrives, okay yes I know right now that’s far-fetched but did you see how 2018 left us like Justin Timberlake left *NSYNC or maybe a little more current like Toni Braxton just left Birdman a.k.a Cash Money? So yeah, you really can’t put off tomorrow what we are going to do this year….Okay??
I came up with 19 things because, well we’re in 2019 and
there’s A LOT of ground to cover mentally, spiritually and physically. So,
Let’s Get right to it shall we??
LET’S THINK MORE:
Positively – No matter what, try to find the good in every situation. I promise it’s there.
Wisely – Let’s try to think before we speak, my mouth has gotten me into more trouble than I care to say and let’s not even talk about my emotions that drives the get-away car. The bible says, a soft answer turns away wrath but grievous words stir up anger. Tell your emotions to give you the keys….
Thoughtfully – Let’s think more about someone else than ourselves.
Maturely – I know this is hard but sometimes you have to be the bigger person in a situation, even if it means saying you’re sorry first.
Responsibly – you know what this means…lol
Unapologetically – having/living without regrets
LET’S DO MORE:
Exercises, Exercise, Exercise – If you haven’t been to the gym in ages (like me…hehe) then you don’t want to go out the gate committing to working out an hour or more a day….That won’t happen. A little bit a day goes a long way….trust me! (5-10min is a great start!)
Picking Better Food Choices – Getting fresh meals delivered to your house every week is truly ideal (I may have to check into this later) however; it’s not affordable for everyone. So Instead, start small. It may be adding green beans instead of fries to a meal and/or opting for the side salad instead of the fries for a burger or picking up an apple or orange instead of the cookies out of the vending machine at work (preaching to the choir here, I’ve done it) Take Small steps towards health and soon….it’ll be a full commitment.
Things for ourselves – YASSSS!!! I mean this wholeheartedly. Ladies and Gents schedule a massage once a month or go get your nails, feet or hair done. Take some ME time for you, even if it means taking some time and going window shopping or getting an ice-cream cone. Even taking some time off work, not to run errands or do things for the kids but for YOU. Know how they say on an airplane cover your nose before anyone else’s? – Yes, Exactly…..YOU FIRST!
Calendars on Our phones – Use It! Soooo, let me just say I know all of our phones should have a calendar on them and that’s great if you use them. I noticed last year that my brain had failed me in remembering quite a few things – a friend then asked me, why don’t you use the calendar on your phone?? I know this might sound silly or juvenile but that calendar has been a lifesaver! We get new phones and sometimes don’t use half of the stuff on them…I don’t know if you do it or not, but make use of your phone calendar and it has reminders, so there’s no excuse to miss those very important appointments.
Say I Love You! – OMGosh, we don’t say this enough. Practice not only telling yourself this but others as well. LOVE IS THE KEY!
Take Chances – We miss many of the chances we don’t take. Take more chances
Forgive…..Need I say more?
LET’S ACHIEVE MORE:
Dust it OFF – You don’t even have to tell me, everyone has something that they put on the back burner to be written, explored or tackled for later and that later ended or ends up being 2yrs long….whatever it is, dust it off and put yourself on a timeframe to get it done (For me? Book #2 is on the dust it off list, what’s on yours?)
Travel – In my mind, there are A LOT of places that I go too – only for them to be just that…stuck and lived out in my mind; have you been there? This year, plan to go on that long-awaited trip – even if it’s a hike…..travel someplace you’ve never been. I’m actually working on getting my passport and visa to travel to Africa or Russia this year….fingers crossed. Let’s hope my wallet is favorable = )
Social Media what you Say? – Okay, we all love social media and in this world (maybe this should’ve gone under the DO MORE tab) however, I feel as though we all could use a needed break from social media. It’s amazing because once I scroll and look at one pic or statement – next thing you know an hour or two has passed by and I’m tired. An hour or two lost that could’ve been used on something productive (like the Dust if Off bit above)
Take Some Classes – whether you want to cook better, learn how to ballroom dance, do pottery, take those much needed business classes or even if you want to learn how to crochet (not my thing and I tried it…lol) whatever it is you want to do, Nike says “Just Do It” I say “Just Take It” let’s be more adventurous this year, speaking of which….
MeetUps Anyone? – Last year I signed up to do a meetup with a group of writers who were supposed to meet at our local library here in town every week, needless to say – it didn’t work out as the library had not heard of such a group….anywho, there are plenty of meetup activities and places to go and get involved in, you just have to look for them and it depends on what you like or want to do – trust me, there’s a meetup for it. Check it Out!!
Go to the Movies and not on your Couch! – Yes, I do I do I do LOVE the Redbox and enjoy watching a movie in, rather than out. But going out to the movies over the holiday season with my two kids (We saw Bumblebee – Awesome movie by the way!! – Thanks Mallory for the gift card) was a joy. It allowed us to get out of the house and enjoy some fresh air as well as popcorn with everyone else, it was a good outing and I loved seeing an even bigger screen.
And Last but Not Least
JUST BE TRUE TO BEING YOU!!! NOTHING MORE, NOTHING LESS.
Life is short, don’t let another year go by without living yours out loud!!!
So, how was your holiday! And what are you thinking, planning or achieving this year!!
My dating life literally went down the tube last year; after years of yo-yo dating and really not acquiring “the one” I decided last year after my last attempt at trying to have a relationship, fizzled out to just go M.I.A with the dating scene. I mean, the relationship was cool in the beginning but mid-way through I began to see a side of him that I knew wouldn’t be good enough to continue a relationship less known marriage. During that time, God had began to deal with me about my body and giving myself to him, those dealings soon lead me to become so convicted; I stopped cold turkey. Trying to explain that to him was an even bigger chore because he didn’t have a relationship with God, (at least not in the way that I have a relationship with him) so therefore I knew, he wouldn’t understand completely as to where I was coming from.
I knew it was God that was leading me away from that relationship as our time together became less and less and I became unusually busy as ever to try and travel an hour and some change away to see him – before, I would hop on the road with no problem; but soon found that increasingly difficult as the months passed by – soon what seemed like 1000 text messages a day to check up on each other, ended up being 1 text a day, if that and no phone calls. As our lives became like two ships sailing in the night, so did my communication with him – soon, I didn’t take notice to him at all, it was like we never met. But anyways…fast forward….
As God began to deal with me about my alone time, I got the feeling that maybe God just wants me to be alone this season. I suddenly realized that I didn’t’ want to be in a relationship and my new year’s resolution coming into this year was “I’m going to dedicate this whole year to God and not being in a relationship” which was a newbie for me, because when I looked back over my life – I noticed that I had “always” been in some type of relationship with someone, I had never had a year of where I didn’t date at all. So, feeling as if I needed a purge year – 2018 was my year to be “totally” single. I mean, I have two kids (teen and pre-teen) and they need my full attention with no distractions. Well, you know how when you say you’re going to do something and get your mind made up to do it – here comes the enemy with his many distractions, curve balls, twists and gimmicks.
I left work one night and before I reached home, decided to go into the store and pick up a couple of items as the kids were yet, out of school again due to the snow. While on the noodle isle, I seen this guy next to me but didn’t pay him any mind; suddenly he says “Those kids are out of school more than I was when I was growing up,” and of course I responded and said “You got that right!!” So, his conversation didn’t stop there – next thing you know he was telling me about himself, his job, where he was from and how he can’t seem to find the right woman – even though he’s a good man. I briefly told him my mishaps with dating of being the nice girl and finishing last and we laughed and kept conversing, so finally he said – you know what? I want to take you out on a date. I tell you what, the next time we bump into one another – we’re going out! I was a little puzzled because he never asked for my number and how did he know we would ever see each other again. I said okay, cool and we parted ways.
Well, as fate would have it – I had to go back into the store the next day. Prior to going in, I remember thinking to myself – how ironic would it be to see the same guy in here again. And as “serendipity” would have it – as soon as I walked in the store, there he was at the checkout. I couldn’t believe it! Really???, when he saw me – the first thing he said was OKAY, WOW!!! we’re going on a date!!! We conversed some more over the irony of our second visit and he asked, “So, where would you like to go” – I love seafood, so that’s where I suggested and he agreed. Upon leaving (he still didn’t get my number), we walked out (because I wanted to see if he had his own ride, and he did) as we got to his car, he opened his trunk to put in his groceries and pulled out a study bible for me to look at, Wow, I said…that’s nice – I’ve been looking into getting me a study bible. So as he put the bible back into the trunk, he finalized the plans for us to meet at the restaurant at 12:30pm that Saturday….I said okay, see you then and we parted ways.
That night in my prayer time with God – I told him what had happened (not that he didn’t already know, but sometimes God just wants us to talk to him) and I asked God a question that I had never asked him before about any of my relationships. “Lord, if this person is apart of your will for my life, then reveal it to me and if he isn’t, then reveal that to me also” I spoke to a couple of friends about it and let them know what was going on and left it alone (also something else I never did, talk to people about my relationships). Once Saturday came, I can’t say I was pumped but I was more feeling like I was going to meet a friend, I had purchased him a little gift (nothing much) just a token of my appreciation for him paying for the lunch (in which he said he was going to do).
To be continued…..next Sunday 2/18/18
If you’re liking this story, then hopefully you’ll like my other relationship blunders and bloopers in which I wrote about with fictional characters of course – since this is the month of “love and relationships” I thought I would share those dating experiences with you….so starting this Thursday 2/15/18 you’ll get a chance to read my 2 part story series entitled “I Will Wait Until God Says, It’s Time!” Hopefully it’ll make you laugh, think and if you’re currently single whether male or female and struggling with dating or finding the right one, then my hope is that you begin to seek God before you head into another “failed” relationship. Stay Tuned!!
Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager
Don’t have time to read? You can listen to this post on Soundcloud below; just push the orange button to play!
If you haven’t done it or thought about it by now, then I know it’ll be coming soon and that’s “Goals and Preparations for the new year. Whether mentally, physically or spiritually; with each coming year, we all get our minds set on moving forward in each, however; if we don’t really sit down and plan out how that move forward is going to take place, then we’ll find ourselves taking “junk” from the previous year into the new year, in which doesn’t make it so new, right?
I loved this post “Preparing for the New Year” by blogger – Sharon Simons. It’s a blueprint of questions as well as reflections of things that we all should be thinking about as we move forward into 2018. “What do you wish to leave behind this year”, “What goals didn’t you accomplish this year that’s on the top of your list next year.” Sharon shares her triumphs as well as her downfalls for 2017 and gives us all a mental look of what we should be thinking about as we all prepare to move forward. This post will not only give you something to think about but will get you geared up into moving forward with a new mindset as well. So, check out her post and grab your notebooks to take notes!!
Follow the highlighted link Below to read more of this thought provoking post…
I love taking the time to reflect and think deeply about all my experiences over the past 12 months, harnessing the rare and fresh energy of a new year and using it to refocus myself. 2017 is coming to an end soon and I’m really grateful to God for his grace and love, this year […]