Mindsets & Mental Stress

photo above courtesy of bing 

Recently, as me and my brother-in-law were talking, he began to tell me how he was mentally tired. He works all the time it seems like and really never gets a break or have a “down” time and when he is off (which is sometimes only for a day) it’s filled with other things to do, such as take the children to the doctor; mowing the lawn; taking care of things around the house that was pushed on the agenda for his next off day or meeting with his own doctors, he and my sister are both the same way when it comes down to some much needed R&R, they just don’t have the time for it!

I can totally relate to both of their dilemma’s because on top of taking care of the house, working hard to provide for two kids, making sure I stay on top of my own job and keeping up with what needs to be paid, what I did “actually” pay, to kids field trips, to making sure there’s money for this and that and keeping the car running and keeping my own health in check – where in the world is the time to settle down and BREATHE!!! at the end of the day, I’m ready to pull my hair out – LITERALLY!

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HELP, PLEASSSSSSEEEEEE!!

We have to find the time and balance to take care of ourselves – No, seriously….we do! It’s detrimental that we do, not only for our sanity but for our overall health. I’ve often heard people say, “I’ll have plenty of time to rest, when I’m DEAD!” and while that is very true; I don’t want to, as Rihanna sings “WERK, WERK, WERK, WERK , WERK, WERK” until I’m dead or so sick until I can’t do anything at all. Some people feel as though they have to plan for some elaborate trip in order to get away and get some ME TIME in, and that’s great – but we all know that sometimes plans are meant to be cancelled. You don’t have to plan for a big trip or go away to some remote location to get a little mental clarity, now don’t get me wrong, if you have it like that and truly plan to go through with it, by all means, do what you have to do; but sometimes there are a couple of simple things we can do right now, before plan that big trip.

Listed below are a couple of things that I currently do to get some “me time” in everyday, while they may be very simple; they’ve really helped to keep my stress level at an all time low. 

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photo taken from okclipart

 

Take Your Time and Don’t Rush It ðŸ•”

When my kids were much smaller and in daycare, I would get off of work at 5pm and rush to pick them up before 6pm (otherwise, I’d get charged a dollar for every minute after) I worked like 45min away. Sometimes it was a struggle getting there on time due to the traffic but I didn’t want to be late or pay a fine. Everything revolved around my kids when they were younger and the thought of me doing anything for myself, was a forbidden thought that I didn’t think mothers were supposed to have. One day my boss asked me, Roshonda?, “Why do you rush to get your kids – you need to take some time for yourself, get off a little early and stop by to grab you an ice-cream and enjoy it by yourself before you pick the kids up.” The thought of her saying that was like, death to my ears “Stop for Ice-Cream?” was she serious? But, she was right – sometimes we can rush life so fast until we don’t take out time to enjoy the simple things. Just because I had small kids at the time, didn’t mean that I had to forget about me – taking that ice-cream break was not only life changing but it helped my sanity as well.

De-stress and Rest ðŸ˜´

This is all about finding things you can do to make your “you” day stress free, such as going to the library, checking out that new food chain or clothing store that just opened up or scheduling a massage (you can schedule this for your next day off) or going to the park and feeding the birds or watching the water or just sitting in your car or under a tree, listening to some music or catching up on that book that’s been collecting dust on your shelf, that you promised to read months ago. You may have to think about a couple of simple things that you can do, but trust me – it’ll be worth it. Have you checked out your downtown yet?, I love walking into shops and just looking around. **Getting a good night’s rest, helps your mental clarity and health also – even if you have to schedule it; just make sure you stick to it!**

Sometimes, you gotta keep it a secret ðŸ¤«

Okay, so I’m still working on being good at this BUT – sometimes you can’t tell people when you’re off work or if you’re leaving work early OR have some spare time in your day (unless you plan to hang out with them) I say this because sometimes people have a tendency to add their to-do list on your off day. Unless it’s an emergency and people need to know you’re off for a particular reason…..It’s okay to keep the day a Hush Hush. Especially if you want to get in some extra sleep or just lounge around the house in your jammies, sipping some tea or coffee and reading the newspaper or catching up on your favorite show (now that you have the remote all to yourself). If you constantly sound the alarm when you’re off of work…..you’ll never get any rest.

Hey, Let’s Walk It Out ðŸ‘ŸðŸ‘Ÿ

Exercise (as I’ve come to really know it) is a great stress relief – it gets those endorphins going and those energy levels up, making you sure to conquer the day – no matter how hard it may be. Do you eat lunch at your desk (I’m so guilty of this one)….I’m learning to stop eating lunch at my desk andddddd also, learning to leave the desk and take a walk. Sometimes, I’ll even go to my car let my seat back and turn on some music and take a nap or just eat and relax, I also take a walk around outside – especially when the day is beautiful. Walking has major benefits, for your mind and your health – it helps you de-stress from a long, busy and hectic day.

There is only one YOU and you only get one BODY, don’t lean on the motto of “I’ll rest when I’m dead” because we all will, one day but that day doesn’t have to be rushed. While, we must werk, werk, werk to make sure our necessities are not interrupted; we must take out time to make sure our mental stress and mindsets are also on our to-do list of important things to take care of as well…..

What do you do to maintain your stress levels?

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Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager

P.S. I have a BIG, HUGE Announcement on Next Thursday 4/5/18 – Stay Tuned!!

 

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EnSPIRED: So, What Are You Doing With Your Tax Money This Year?

photo above courtesy of bing 

I featured this story last year in a newsletter I created called EL-SPIRED (God Spired). It was also featured in a magazine that I wrote for. Since tax season is in heavy rotation, I thought I’d share it again. This was a very inspirational and thought provoking story….check it out!

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IT’S TIME TO MAKE IT RAIN!!!!

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Yes, It’s that time of year again! Christmas time!!!! or I guess I should say, Tax Time – a time in which most people, look forward to every….single….year (unless you hit the lottery or just got it like that and if so, kudos to you my friend!) But, in my household it’s that big blessing that I can’t wait to come around.

Tax Season is the most joyous time of the year in which where everyone can finally buy the things they want. Every year we hope, wish and pray that January gets here SOON enough, so we can file those taxes and spend, spend, spend. But how many of us actually use that money to pay off bills or pay bills up in order to free some of our 9-5 pay checks. I have to be honest, when tax time used to come around “Bills” were the last thing on my mind to pay – seriously, because I’m always focused on the things that I didn’t get an opportunity to buy when I got my regular check, or the things I have to sacrifice and put back because I didn’t have enough money to get it. “Get my Drift?”

Now while I know this isn’t the correct way to spend this “once a year” money. There’s a single mother from Gaffney, South Carolina that’s got me thinking about spending my taxes a little bit differently this year and maybe you too! According to news site WESH2Christina Knaack – a single mother of two took the internet by storm when she posted a $5400.00 receipt of where she paid her $450.00 a month rent up for a year.

tax money

I got back $5600 on my taxes. Instead of buying my kids the latest Jordans or fancy electronics I paid my rent for the YEAR. I’m a single mom and I do it all buy myself on a minimum wage job. I kno that a roof over my kids head is what’s important. My kids don’t want for anything because my priorities are straight. And this also means I will have that extra 450 a month to do things with my kids. Christina Knaack

Knaack stated that she didn’t expect the post to go viral but glad that it went public so if anyone shared it, they would be able to see how a recovering addict made it possible to get off the streets and maybe it would encourage them to find a better way. Christina has received both positive and negative comments about her decision, however; she said if the post inspires people, then she’s happy with that. It definitely inspired me. What About You?

So, what do you plan to do with your taxes this year….Before you make it rain and start popping bottles – just think of Christina’s story. If we play our cards right – we will not only be able to celebrate this bless-ed “tax season” for one month, but we’ll be able to celebrate ALL YEAR LONG!!!! You feel me?..

Be Wise first and Make it Rain Last! 

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You’ll be Happy You Did!!

P.S. If you haven’t filed your taxes already, you have until April 17th to get’em done!

 

Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager

#Sunday’s Thought: What’s Up with 1022?

photo above courtesy of flickr

Have you ever, no matter what you did or how your day progressed – seemed to always find yourself looking at your clock at exactly the same time everyday or maybe another day, just out of the blue?

I know I’ve heard people say that they’d dream about certain numbers in which would either be good power-ball plays that resulted in them winning the lottery (might I take a break for a quick second and say, when I would play – THAT NEVER HAPPENED TO ME!) I mean, I tried it – even used a fortune cookie one time, after watching the movie Lottery Ticket, and still – NO WIN! guess it only happens to whom it’s supposed to happen too, huh. Well anyway…….

Programming

People attribute numbers to many different meanings, just this week I was speaking to a friend of whom stated that she needed to talk to me about something – soon after, my message box became filled with pictures, all showing the number 222. She began to explain how these numbers kept popping up, from her daughters surgery date, her first hospital room, to the date in which she renewed her license, her score in scrabble, her office number and quite a few other occurrences in which all involved those three numbers. I was amazed as I had been having the same issue with seeing specific numbers. She attributed hers to angels and began to talk about angel numbers in which resulted in specific meanings.

I honestly don’t know anything about the angel terminology when it comes to numbers but all I knew was that I couldn’t seem to shake….1022. The backstory to this situation started about 4 months ago, I had been consulting the Lord about a choice I had to make concerning this really good exercise class or should I say (boot camp) that I had become a part of. I really needed to get in shape, so when a friend invited me to go to this exercise program that was being held in a local park for FREE, I was all ears.

The program started in the park but soon got transitioned into a facility. Anyone whom joined them in the park, was immediately entered to get their first 30 days free. I was stock’d about it and continued on throughout the process that is, until my 30 days came to an end; now comes the part in which they want you to pay full price……..crickets……..I knew the day was coming but I also knew that I didn’t have that type of money to continue. Once everything was over, I prayed about it and decided to leave it in God’s hands, I wanted to join so bad; I had even thought about doing a salary advance to get locked in. Once I prayed and asked the Lord to give me a sign, he didn’t right away but about a week or so later – the gym held a promotion to pay $99 for 6 weeks! I quickly jumped on board – Thank you God!

However, in the midst of all of this – I kept seeing the numbers 1022, not knowing what it meant; I was wondering if maybe my mom was trying to tell me something beyond the grave, as those numbers were the month and day of her birthday. No matter what I was doing day or night – every time I looked at the clock….there it was looking back at me, 1022.

Proverbs 10-22.2

In the meantime, the promotion with the gym was coming to an end and there I was faced to make a decision – should I or shouldn’t I join. I really wanted too, because after all I had lost some weight and was seeing a drastic improvement in my health; even my doctor told me to stick with the program, but what he didn’t know was that it was quite expensive and I while I wanted to join and stick to it – financially, it was impossible.

Again, I talked to the Lord about it and asked him to give me a sign – two weeks past by and there I was looking at the last day of the workout, bittersweet it was…but I just didn’t want to make a decision without hearing God’s voice. That night while sitting up in my bed, I haphazardly opened my bible and it opened up to this…

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Proverbs 10:22

It was like God had opened up the bible himself and directed my eyes to this scripture. When I opened the bible, my eyes hit the verse 22 first and when I looked up to see the chapter number, it was 10. God was letting me know all that time, that he had me and yes, while this opportunity seemed like the way to go; his word revealed that (paraphrasing) he had my back and that whatever blessing he provides or allowed to come my way, would bring peace and not disturbance – whether to our life or our finances.

After I received that confirmation, I felt at peace about leaving. I knew that God had something better for me and all I had to do was be patient and wait. The week following after I left the gym, I worked out at home – just as I would have, had I been at the gym – I wanted to remain faithful despite the fact of not being there. Before the week ended; one of the young ladies I worked out with; called me another friend of mine out on Facebook to participate in a fitness challenge (another boot camp) that was being held in town for 4 weeks! I immediately went to the link that was provided and sure enough, there was another challenge – sign up was free and guess what, it only cost $10 for the WHOLE FOUR WEEKS!

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I tell you, the bible says I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry.” Psalms 40:1 (NLT). I promise, I don’t know what you may be going through today or what signs or “numbers =)” that God may be showing you but take note that God does hear your every prayer. We can’t expect God to come down off his throne and speak directly to us (although sometimes I do wish that would happen) but he sends confirmation through others in which sometimes comes in the most unusual ways. Once you put something at God’s feet – just sit back, wait and watch – You just never know how he’ll show up on your behalf and it may not be in the way that you think.

Isaiah 55 8-9

 

Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager

 

 

 

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Who Are These People, And Where Do they Belong in My Life!?

photo above courtesy of bing

What is friendship to you? I mean, No – like really….what is it? Do you know who your true friends are annnndddddddd…are the people you call friends now, do you know their true purpose for being in your life?

I have to say, I was shocked; stunned and a bit perplexed one day when I was thinking of someone, and when I mean someone – I mean someone that I considered a friend…all of a sudden, it was like someone tapped me on the shoulders and said “But why are they your friend?” and if I can be honest and very transparent right now, I had no idea! I mean it’s not like we hung out or even talked on the phone, maybe a text here or there but I soon realized that maybe they didn’t consider me a friend like I was considering them a friend.

Too Busy? Can’t Read it All? No Worries – Listen to this post here 

I’ve always been the type of person that instantly deemed everyone as my friend, from a person showing the smallest gesture of kindness, to the person whom maybe took out time to do something nice for me or the person who decided to ask me to lunch or even hang out with them for the day. I immediately created this “Roshonda’s Friend Wand” and magically transformed them from being ordinary to being my friend – no question about it, that’s who they were going to be to me and I to them, or so I thought…..

NO, NO

What dawned on me, was….

Sometimes people are put in our lives for different reasons, case in point – when my mom passed away in 2016. I had people all around me that offered their sympathy, kindness and generosity during that emotional time, in which made me feel as though we were good friends and I graciously added them to my circle – but just because they were kind, doesn’t mean that they were meant to be my friend; God could have just placed them there to be in my corner during a very difficult time in my life, which was meant to be for a season – not an eternity or an happily ever after. .

I can’t tell you how many people I’ve let in my life, to think their my friend only to be heartbroken when things don’t work out all because I was trying to hold on to someone whom was a straight up distraction or whose season in my life was probably meant to be no more than for a month or a second. Another case in point: A long time ago God told me that every guy that came into my life was not meant for me to date, he only allowed them to cross my path for a particular reason. I remember one guy I met, gave me some superior hair tips (no he wasn’t gay, I don’t think..lol) however; I had been asking God about my hair and to lead me to products that at the time, I felt would help, I had been having some issues with thinning edges and the info he gave me was LIFE! and in return, God allowed me to speak some encouraging words to him, words in which he needed in order to get to his next destination, in which was not to walk down the aisle with me, as I had so purposed in my head.

So, you see? God only had him to cross my path for that particular reason, he had sisters whom went through the same thing and therefore his attention to their situation, allowed him to give me some valuable information that I truly needed, now if I had kept him around due to a simple tip, I would have been keeping someone around that was suppose to just drop a tip and go…lol…The thing is; everyone, whether man or woman crosses our paths for different reasons and during particular seasons, it’s up to us to find out the reason for their visit, get what they have for you and move on. (depending on their true purpose)

NO, NO2

Now don’t get me wrong, their are some people that come in our lives and they are meant to “sit for a spell” if you get my drift, who knows – they may even be with you for the long haul (until death do you part)….you never know.

However; don’t be afraid to ask God about your circle in which can be a double-edged sword because in reality we all want friends, we all want people we can hang out with, we all want people to love us and we all want to have this girl or this guy group but in the end who are they? Are these people adding value to your life….or are they draining you dry of your emotions, time, love and space. Remember, you invited them and as long as that door is opened; you’ll keep inviting people whom really have no purpose for your life – AT ALL! and it’s not that these individuals are bad it’s just that their job fulfillment in your life has expired. (Sort of like keeping old food in the fridge after the due date, if it consistently stays in there and is not removed; it’s going to cause the fridge to stink and soon it’s pollution, will cause the other food to expire quicker than it would have or add a terrible smell to it; this is what happens when you keep “seasonal people only” in your life for too long) 

My Two Pennies on the matter?: Ask God about people and their dealings in your life, why are they there and what is their purpose, you’ll be surprised that the people who’s in your life was probably only supposed to be there for a short period of time and If not inquired about, these individuals could halt us from moving forward into the destiny that God has pre-planned for our future. No worries, you’ll come across others and this time one may come across that’s meant to stay forever.

De-cluttering is not just for houses or closets but for Individuals TOO!

DeClutter
photo courtesy of Spectator Life

 

Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager

 

 

 

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EnSpired: From The Car to The Red Carpet: It’s Ryan Coogler, Director of Black Panther

photo above courtesy of bing

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Okay, so unless you’ve been M.I.A for the past month, don’t have a television or just don’t go to the movies – AT ALL! then maybe you weren’t aware of a movie called “Black Panther” in which grossed more than 240 million dollars (US) and over 400 million worldwide in it’s opening weekend of (February 16, 2018); which is the highest grossing opening of all time, according to Vanity Fair. Can somebody say WOW!!! and I don’t even think that’s a good word to describe the magnitude of this  moment.

At the helm of such success is none other than 31 yr old  film director, Ryan Coogler. However; this is not Coogler’s first acclaimed film – he also directed and wrote Fruitvale Station, starring Michael B. Jordan and Creed, in which again starred Michael B. Jordan and Sylvester Stallone in which gained much notoriety for Coogler.

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Creed (2015) & Fruitvale Station (2013) – Directed by Ryan Coogler

So, as you can see – Coogler is no stranger to the film world; although this may be your first time hearing of him. Out of both films, Black Panther leads the pack and has taken Coogler from being sought as just acclaimed director to being put up in the ranks with such likes as Steven Spielberg. According to CNBC, when Coogler was a kid, he received his first comic book in which was “Black Panther” – fascinated by the fact that there were comic books that contained African Americans, this sparked something in Coogler – BUT, film-making was not on his to do list – football was.

When the football program got cancelled at his college (Saint Mary’s), Coogler transferred to Sacramento State with the intent to play football, but got whiff of a film school at the University of Southern California – Los Angeles by a professor:

“It was either go there or play wide receiver. “I was short, my prospects weren’t the highest, so I jumped off that cliff and drove to L.A.”

A major jump that lead him to live out of his car during his first semester at USC – however; that didn’t bother Coogler, whom used that “gray” time as motivation to create a series of short films, one in which included a film entitled “Fig” which chronicled the life of a prostitute trying to bring positive change to her life all while raising a child on her own. 

“That film is from deep research, I spent Christmas break on the streets and got a lot of stories. I never want to shy away from the truth.”

In creating his third film and with a budget of $200 million, Coogler was determined to bring a black super hero to the big screen and that he did. The little boy whom questioned if there were any black people represented in comic books, has now opened up the doors for many young African american boys and girls to see themselves in print and on the big screen as heroes and she-ro’s. Thanks Ryan Coogler, for being persistent and paving the way!!

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Stars of Black Panther (Bing) – from left, Chadwick Boseman; Danai Gurira; Lupita Nyong’o; Michael B. Jordan  

Move over Hollywood, Ryan Coogler is here to Stay!

 

Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager