What’s It Like to Be Human, You Say? Anne Burton, Tell Us How In “Being Human – A User Guide!”

Featured Image: Anne Burton

Disclosure: This book was gifted to me by Anne’s publishing company in exchange for my honest review. All views concerning this book are 100% my own and not of anyone else’s.

I know what you must be thinking and Anne stated this in her book, “Why in the world would someone ask, what’s it like to be human?” I mean, don’t you know? – you are human, right?

Image credit: Questions (Gif)

Of course, I am! Otherwise you’d be reading something that a robot wrote, but no I’m very much human and hopefully, you are too, unless you really are a robot reading this…hmm…

Being human is a trait that we all should “know” how to do and do very well, because “being human” means, you’re just being yourself, right? but according to Anne Burton’s book “Being Human – A User Guide” being human is far more entailed than it sounds. The user guide was created by Burton and is based on her own learning experiences and personal journeys over the last 10yrs and our mind and actions play a big role in both. Things, Burton stated she wished she’d known when her children were babies.

“I wrote it because the contents of this book have helped me enormously and because I wish I had known about it sooner, when my children were babies, because there are things I would have done differently. I wrote it because I wanted to share what I have learned so far in this experience of being human.”

Anne Burton, Author – Being Human

There are many things that I’ve encountered in my life and I sometimes say, “If I knew then, what I know now” Mannn, I would do things so differently! If those issues are not handled, we take those negative vibes into adulthood and begin to act out in ways that are not normal and therefore use excuses for our behavior. Anne mentioned it in her book but I’ve always heard people say, “I was born this way” or “I can’t help the way I act” – but, no one is born a certain way or born to have a negative attitude, it’s a mind thing. Anne refers to this as the “Nature vs. Nurture” debate in which she states research says that experience and environment can change our gene expression and that genes can be switched on and off.  I’m a believer that life and circumstances shape us, maybe our family background wasn’t so great, however; I’ve seen people not become products of those environments and “chose” a different and more positive path.

Being Human – A User’s Guide is what this is all about. The influences, behavior’s and experiences that either shape our life for the better or the worse. According to Anne’s book, we spend the first seven years of our lives (that’s from the time we’re born up until 7 yrs old) in somewhat of a trance. Information gets into our brain through our senses of sight, smell, hearing, taste, and feeling. We process it, make meaning from it and then our brain stores it without us even knowing its done such a thing.

That part was really powerful to me; it’s amazing because I don’t really remember when I was 3 or even 4, 5 or 6 yrs old. I remember bits and pieces or you can say glimpses of things during that period. Interestingly enough there are quite a few random memories that have come up out of the blue either from childhood or even early adulthood that I didn’t remember doing or knew my brain held on too.

Anne Burton, Author – “Being Human”

Anne calls these experiences “Programs” where our brain takes our memories, experiences, sights, smells and sounds and create scenarios which tell us how to respond, act, communicate, make friends and even down to what we put in our mouth to eat.

Another program our brain is good at is keeping us in line with our HABITS!

Habits are those things that we do without even giving it a second thought, things that our brain knows we should be doing automatically and programs us to do it. Ever heard the saying “It takes 21 days to create a habit.” And I still believe that’s true, however, I do believe in most cases that if we do something repeatedly for 5 days, our brain picks it up as a daily routine and next thing you know, our body becomes in sync with that newfound thing and it’s a wrap, sort of. The more you do it, the more the habit grows. Ever felt funny about not doing something that you would normally do on a daily basis? It’s almost like you can’t function because something’s missing from your day.

Anne states that all these programs are run automatically, like an alarm going off at a particular time. There was something else Anne mentioned in her book, that made me do a little research on and that’s “left-brain thinking” – In Being Human, Anne believes that it’s this type of thinking that keeps us stressed out, rather than what I call – Living in the moment and letting some things go..

Now, I have to tell you, I didn’t understand or even know that there was such a thing as left-brain nor right-brain thinking, but there really is and what I found out was pretty interesting.

It’s said that people are either one or the other “left or right” brain thinkers – meaning one side of their brain is more dominant than the other side. According to Healthline; If you’re more analytical and methodical in your thinking, you’re said to be left-brained. If you tend to be more creative or artistic, you’re thought to be right-brained.

Image Credit: Healthline.com

Per Anne’s book and the information I learned, I realized – I’m right-brained. How about you? The left and right brain thinking is just a little piece of what Being Human or as I’d like to call it, understanding how our human nature acts, responds and communicate with everyday life issues is only the half…

Anne also believes that we have six programs that make up our human operating system. Burton believes that these entities may need an upgrade or reboot to support the day by day processes of being human and to get us to where we want to be in our lives.

They are the Six C’s of Being Human:

  • Consciousness
  • Communication
  • Connection
  • Courage
  • Creativity
  • Compassion

Burton states that all these programs are linked together and dependent upon each other to work properly if one is more valued than the other, Burton states we could and will feel the detrimental effect of how the other ones respond. Therefore she advises that you work on each of them daily.

“I don’t know what you should do with your life or what you want to achieve only you know that. This is about taking care of aspects of your life that will help you whatever it is that you decide to do ”

Anne Burton, Author – Being Human

Being Human – A User Guide per Burton is not a book that’ll make you change in an instant. It takes time and with practice, you’d be able to make subtle changes to your mind as well as your environment. Look, we all have issues, maybe we didn’t have the best childhood or maybe your childhood was great and the pitfalls came in when you became an adult. Thing is, we all have something to work on, things that can make us do better, be better and live better but it takes the practice of trying to do the right things as well as make the right choices every single day. We may not be able to change where we’ve been, but we can definitely change where we’re going and that my friend is what Being Human is all about…

TO GET YOUR OWN COPY OF “BEING HUMAN – A USER’S GUIDE” YOU CAN VISIT AMAZON.COM
About Author Anne Burton

Anne Burton was born in Chesterfield, Derbyshire in 1965. Before starting to write the BEING HUMAN book series she worked as an accountant in industry. Here she learned first hand how difficult change can seem and how the way that we live our lives has, for many of us, become disconnected from what we need to function well as human beings. This realization leads to her passion for understanding why we do the things we do and what determines how we experience the world we live in.

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A Survivor’s Story

Photo credit above via Roshonda – B Creative

By Amy Temple

As most of you know I have learning disabilities.

I’ve had to deal with all kinds of discrimination and rejections for most of my life.

However, what I’m about to confess is something that I hadn’t openly talked about to many people.

In junior high, I encountered a lot of bullying and harassment. Every day I was verbally and occasionally physically harassed. I’d get called all sorts of derogatory names, mocking my learning disabilities. There were trippings, pushes, and verbal threats.

Photo credit: Bullying hurts via Canva

I was so frightened to go to school. I would huddle up against the wall in between classes clutching my bookbag tightly. I would often go homesick.

The school administration really tried hard to get the abuse under control but it was a big school so there was only so much they could do.

After two years my parents finally moved away to another town.

I attended high school in a nice and quiet country town. What a relief it was to see friendly people and not be afraid I was going to be assaulted.

However, I dealt with a male student who asked me out frequently for over a year! He wouldn’t take no for an answer. I found all those familiar feelings of fear returning. I finally got a teacher to get him to back off.

I found myself dealing with some serious trauma issues. I dealt with anxiety, fear, and insecurity.

I wanted to be approved of so badly! I wanted to be free from all of my negative feelings. During my senior year, I thought maybe if I had the attention of a popular guy… all my mental problems would be over.

So, I mustered up the courage and asked one of them out.

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In the end, instead of it being lovers bliss. It ended up being a practical joke that the guy and his friend played on me. I felt like such a fool. Let me tell you that didn’t help my low self-esteem at all!

As I previously mentioned I dealt with discrimination and rejection in the workforce, too. No one would hire me because of my learning disabilities. A brilliant job opportunity fell through because co-workers lied about me.

Photo credit: Workplace harassment via Bing

When I was volunteering at a local retirement home, a male resident assaulted me by groping and attempting to kiss me.

With all of the trauma, I experienced I was a mess!

I spent years reading self-help books…it was much cheaper than therapy!

I could not understand why I was being treated like I was.

  • Why was I bullied?
  • Why was I harassed?
  • Why was I assaulted?
  • What is so wrong with me that nobody would hire me?
  • Why would someone lie about me so I wouldn’t be hired at was to be my only decent chance for a job?

I found it hard to trust. I pretty much kept to myself only spending time with my family.

I had imaginings of a bigger and better life but all of what I went through kept me away from pursuing it. I spent 30 years trying to improve my life, to overcome all that happened to me.

I thought plenty of times I had been healed but recently it all came to a nasty head. All the emotions that I been feeling came out one night and I cried! I vented to God for most of the night.

As the song states “Have a little talk with Jesus, Makes it Right!” and it sure did, I hadn’t felt that clear and at peace in a very long time!

I understand I may never forget what happened to me but I can honestly say I am starting to find ways to begin the bigger and better life I have been seeking.

I have come to understand I have to take life one day at a time. I have to keep pressing forward and not look back.

To my fellow survivors…

What happened to us was not our fault! We must continue on living and not give the abusers any more power.

You are just as worthy as anyone else, hence the song from Gloria Gaynor!

I WILL SURVIVE! I DID SURVIVE & SO WILL YOU!!

Wanna Hang Out With Me Tonight?

Photo Credit above by rawpixel.com from Pexels

Hey, Everybody!!

Okay, so it’s evident – I miss my blogging community. Like for real, for reals…..I ain’t gonna lie about it. Do I have new content? Well, not really…lol…you would think me being gone for this little period of time that I would have at least a journal full of topics but if I can be very transparent – I DON’T! ( I know, shame on me =()

I’ve been busy for sure, working on my business baby and trying to show it as much LOVEEEE as possible and in between doing that, holding down the singles ministry, coming up with content for my new business page (more on that in a jiffy) all while holding down a 9 to 5 (and did I mention parenting?, Yeah that too!), so it’s been a little challenging trying to come up with appropriate, well I hate to say that because it sounds like I post inappropriate content on just about anything – however, you would think I’d have some new content to come back and WOW you with, but nothings been coming to me.

Anywho, maybe by the time I grace the blogging stage again, I’ll have a little somethin-somethin for ya. Speaking of busy and business – I have a new facebook business page (still working on the website) for my new business Roshonda B Creative! For those of you that may be new, I took a little break from blogging to try and build up my brand (that still sounds funny to say) but it’s a writing and creative design company in where I create flyers, social media handles, writing content, simple websites, logo’s and I even do book reviews, I do a little ghostwriting as well for businesses and so much more.

I just felt the urge of God pushing me into this venture, I mean don’t get me wrong, I’ve actually been doing this for about 15+ years as a hobby. This is just the first time in history that I’m actually going full blast with it. (Pray for Me!) So on my Facebook page I post creations that I created for clients as well as do shout-outs to businesses that I’ve used or that maybe someone else could use because we’re all helpers one to the other, right?

On this page, I also give business tips (no, I’m no master or business guru) but when I see something or learn something, I want to share it with everyone else and that’s what I’ll be doing tonight, soooooo would you like to hang out with me? I’m going to go live at 7:30 pm EST tonight to talk about a recent business experience I had and how it may or can help us become better business parents. Whether you’ve been in business 30 years or just started one this year or last week. We could all use some refreshers!

So, if you want too – I’d love to see you tonight on my FB business page! It can be sorta be like a hanging out session in where you get some good information while you’re there. I’d love to see ya and have you aboard!

The link to my FB page is here: https://www.facebook.com/roshondabcreates/ 👈

I hope to see you and if you can’t make it – no worries, you can click on the link and watch the replay. Hopefully, you’re doing very well!

I’ll see you around, Ciao My Friends!!

It’s Moving Season! Are you Ready?

Yes, Yes, Yes – As the season’s are changing, so is life. Now that we’re into the month of March, this is the time of year where weddings are being planned and some lucky bride or bridezilla is looking forward to going down the aisle to her prince charming. But you know what else this is the season of? ….. the BIG MOVE!

Yessss, this is the time of year where rental contracts are up and people are either looking for new digs or contemplating on if they should continue staying where they are. Let me just say, that that’s what I just did, I did the BIG MOVE and let me tell you – you learn something different and new each time. Will this be my last move? According to my aching body, YESSSSSS it will be – but in 2, 3 or 5 years tops. That statement may change, yet again!…LOL

So what did I learn during this move? Chile, A WHOLE LOTTA STUFF

Moving just happens to be one of the toughest and hardest things you’ll do – it’s not only rough on your body (especially if you were sick with the flu the week before the move, like I was – this move liked to killed a sista…lol and I’m still recovering!) but it’s also rough on you mentally as well. Of course with anything you have to have a PLAN and moving is no different. As someone once told me, you have to…

So, if you are or do plan to take that step out of the old and into something new….you’ll have a couple of tips that hopefully could help you “plan” well along the way.

Tip #1 – Room to Room

I’m the type of person that can’t just clean one room – I have to clean multiple rooms at one time. My cleaning starts in the kitchen and then before I can get the kitchen done, I move to the living room and before that’s completed I’m in the bathroom. It’s a little insane but honestly it’s how I work. I figure if I touch everything – then I’m getting more done, which is totally wrong but I do it anyway. However, when you’ve decided that it’s time to move, my suggestion is to take one room at a time and get rid of things you don’t want NOW as well as things you might want to sell (I’ll get to that in a jiffy).

Doing these things now and hopefully you’ve given your landlord a proper 30 day notice. Will help you when move day officially comes, because who wants to take junk into a new place? I don’t and trust me, you don’t either. So now’s the time to decide what stays and what goes.

Jiffy moment here >> Do you know that I had papers (boxes of it) things such as old rental receipts from other places I stayed, old check stubs from years ago, cards from when I graduated high school (let’s not talk about how long ago that was), old letters from a best friend of mine (they were 20 years old!) I even found a love letter I had written to a guy I had a crush on when I was in my last year of high school/first year of college (that I was too nervous to give to him) – So what am I saying? I was carrying ALLLLL this stuff around from place to place for years!!! We never know what we have, go through everything and trash it or dispose of it safely (shred it!) It’s amazing the things we keep hauling around that’s not necessarily pertinent to us now. SO PLEASE, LET IT GO!

Tip#2 – Sell Those Items!

So you know those clothes that you’ve been vowing to get into or that treadmill that’s become your clothes hanger instead of a walking machine? Yeah, sell those items. I’m sure you’ve seen your new place and if it can fit the treadmill, great! but what if it can’t and no sense in taking it over if it’s still going to serve the same duties it’s doing now. SELL IT! that’s exactly what I did.

When it comes to moving I realized that people don’t have traditional yard sales anymore, I mean some people do but now that social media is a gem. Guess what, that’s where the sales are happening! In my county alone there are about 6 different ones and I joined all 6. Let me tell ya, my stuff went like hot cakes – I had so many people inquiring about things until, I was saying things were sold when they really weren’t…..It was crazy but it helped me get rid of a wide variety of things that I either wasn’t currently using or the new place was providing, such as a new washer and dryer. Can I get a WHOOT-WHOOT!!

So check out FB and see if there are online yard sales in your area and say bye bye to the old and yes to getting money for something totally new!

Tip# 3 – Be Safe

While it was exhilarating to sell off my items, I also had to be careful as everyone “online” is not who they say they are. So whether you decide to sell online or some other way, be safe in doing it. People are scared of you just as you are of them…

a) If what you’re selling is something big that cannot fit into your car. Don’t give out your address until you know for sure it’s a sale. I had many people to ask for my address but didn’t actually want to buy the items. It’s okay to let them know the county you’re in but not your address. b) If possible, have someone at the house with you – don’t be alone during an in house transaction. c) Ask that they have correct change before arrival as you don’t carry extra money.

*Bonus Tip* – Try to plan what you’re going to do by a week to week basis. Write it down and stick to it. When you’re in the process of moving, there are many things you can do to get prepped for the big MOVE and if your place looked anything like mine? Trust me, you need to make sure a plan is in place and you’re consistently working on it daily. This will ensure that come Move Day, you’ll be prepared and equipped to only take the items you’re truly going to use and it helps with clearing up your place as well.

Well, these are just a few tips to get started – I have more. Next week I’ll be discussing things you can do to get prepared to prep your rental so you can get that deposit back!

STAY TUNED!!