Sunday’s Thought: Did He Just Stand Me Up?? Part 2

photo above courtesy of bing

My mom used to always tell us, you always show people your appreciation – she would always give people gifts when she met them for the first time, so I sort of picked that up from her and wanted to do the same for him, I mean after all – if he was paying, the least I could do was show a token of my appreciation by having the tip and a gift. As I pulled up to the restaurant, I noticed that the car he was driving two nights before was not  there yet and it was okay, I mean I was 10min early…

I decided not to sit in the car but to go inside and sit in the lobby and wait on him, in which I felt like should have been pulling up at any time now. As I sat there I watched the various people come in and out of the restaurant all the while piercing my eyes through the glass window to watch the parking lot of any sight of his car. I played on my phone, checked my Instagram – scrolled through a couple of quotes all while keeping an eye on the parking lot.

When I looked at the time, it was 15min after – okay, I said. Maybe he got caught in traffic, overslept or just forgot – I mean, I didn’t have a number to call and check the matter either; so that made things even more annoying. 15min turned into 30, 30min turned into 45, 45min turned into an hour. Soon, the people that walked in before me and/or after me was beginning to come out of the restaurant – each with puzzled looks on their faces as if to say “You’re still here?” in fact, one woman just came out and asked “Weren’t you sitting here when we went in?” Yes, ma’am I said with a fake smile – this whole scenario was beginning to be embarrassing as well as sad.

I began to text my friends and tell them how the guy never showed up, they all were encouraging and thought maybe something happened and maybe he couldn’t get there to tell me. All the while I was thinking “How could a good conversation with someone a couple nights ago, lead to them standing you up?” I couldn’t wrap my head around it – but I began to think about the prayer that I prayed to God. I told one of my friends that maybe this was God’s way of protecting me from something that I didn’t need to get into – I mean, he is omniscient and can see further than our eyes ever will. The only thing I knew was that I didn’t want that day to go wasted; one of my friends wasn’t having it, she love seafood and asked could she be my date for the evening – she literally dropped everything and came. So the day didn’t end bad although I was puzzled and a little sad about how the situation turned out, I knew God had his hand in it and my best interest at heart and I thanked him for keeping me from whatever it was, that I didn’t see. Plus, we ate some good fried fish ya’ll…..lol

A COUPLE DAYS LATER…..

I met up with an acquaintance to help her out with a couple of social media issues, but needed to go to the store….AGAIN!….I started to go before my meeting but thought that I would go after as I didn’t expect us to be long. When I left her, I went to Wal-Mart; once I entered the parking lot I parked in front of this elderly woman whom was on the phone, I quickly glanced her – got out and went into the store.

As I came out of the store and got closer to my car – I heard this woman mumbling something about a guy having friends, there was this child with her – her car was now parked in front of me, I looked at them and proceeded to get into my car,  When I got into the car and put my keys into the ignition, I looked up and low and behold – guess who was sitting in the passenger seat of the car the woman parked in front of me got out of….THE GUY THAT STOOD ME UP! For a moment I paused and started to just leave, but I couldn’t – I got out of the car and just stood there looking at him – he was asleep but as he shuffled around in his seat, his eyes came open and he looked right at me. (He looked like he had just seen Casper the ghost!!)

Two boys frightened by Casper

He gave me this stupid look and grin and got out of the car….”Hey, how you doing” he said. I was still standing there looking at him at this point. Nervously, he was fiddling around like he was looking for a fix….as he headed from the passenger side of the car to the back door of the driver side, he said “Hey, what you doing this weekend; you busy?” Really???? Dude???? Like, I’m the same woman that you stood up this past weekend!! Did he actually think, I was stupid enough to go out with him again to get a double whammy of what he served UP? The Nerve! As he made his way back around to the front of the car, now looking towards the stores door. I asked “What happened to you Saturday?” with his head down and kicking at his shoe to get the packed mud off – he said “Something came up” and literally turned around and walked towards the store….no explanation, no I’m sorry, no nothing….(then had the audacity to look back, Oh……if I had a HUGE ROCK!! the place in which I would aim it!)

rock throwing.gif

While I was in utter SHOCK of his response! In that moment, God showed me what he was ALL about and I was so happy and relieved about that. He didn’t want me to get into a mess and he really did have my best interest at heart all because I chose to place the situation at his feet in the beginning and the WILL it had for my life. It also let me know that I need to stick to my guns and stay single this year as I had proposed in the beginning.

While this was guidance for a relationship for me, you may have issues or things going on in which you need to put on the altar before God and let him make the final decision on if it’s a YES or if it’s a NO! I know it’s hard to let go and ask God about our life especially when we so badly want to steer it in our own direction but let this story be proof that God really does want the best for you. Whether it’s a job, car, house or spouse; let God have the last say……Your pockets, mind, sanity and heart will thank you later.

for-i-know-the-plans-i-have-for-you-declares-the-lord-plans-to-prosper-you-bible-quote

Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager

Did you miss Part 1 of this story?, You can read it here

 

This Week

Finish reading the last series of “I Will Wait Until God Says, It’s My Time!” do you think Bernice will finally through in the towel and let God handle it? Or will she keep trying and trying and failing……Check out the ending of this series on Thursday 2/22/18

Remaining “SANE” in Singleness

I’ve often heard the phrase that there are at least 10 women to 1 man. Not only does this put the man at a great advantage having a good selection of women to choose from, but he has quite a few women he could possibly date, and all of them if he really wanted to.

But what about us women? The same ratio that proves to be so strong in the top paragraph for a man is a cat fight for a woman trying to get that one man to notice her. It’s sort of like those bachelor and/or bachelorette shows on T.V. where 30 or so women and men are desperately dying to get that one man or woman’s attention. The kicker is that he or she can only pick one, which leaves everyone else’s dreams of finding the ‘Perfect Guy or Girl’ shattered because now they have to attempt to find happiness and love elsewhere. Starting over again is a process that can drive you truly insane if you let it. Woman-Pulling-Hair-out

Let’s face it, we live in a world where if you haven’t gotten married, had a baby, or even had a guy during a particular holiday season or by a certain age; then society says “There’s something wrong with you” It’s even worse when your family members are constantly asking if you’re dating anyone. All of these issues will drive you insane while living the single life. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to find Mr. or Mrs.’s Right but if you rush it because of outside pressures from family, friends or society, then 9 times out of 10, you’re going to settle.

Here are a couple of things that you can do for yourself so you can stay sane in the midst of your season of singleness.

Tip #1   The Happiness Effect:

The world tells and/or has a way of showing us what happiness is from it’s perspective, most times it’s involving money, fame, relationships or popularity. But true happiness is not defined by what you have or don’t have; it’s defined by how you feel about yourself. What’s going on in your current world right now; what are your feelings about your life and where you mentally at this time? You may say, “Well that has nothing to do with anything” – But it has a lot to do with everything. Happiness attracts the right kind of people or things into your life. If you’re not happy, then you’re subject to attract whatever debris that washes up on the ocean front. I posted a quote on FB this week that says “If You Aren’t Happy being Single, You will never be Happy in a relationship – Get your own Life First, Then Share It. Just like a person whom doesn’t want to enter a dirty house that looks like every hurricane imaginable rummaged through it. It’s the same with a relationship, no one wants to enter a mess that was already in place……they want to enter into peace and tranquility but you must create that environment first, as it will not be created once you get into a relationship.

 

You don’t go into relationships to find Happiness, Happiness occurs before the relationship says “Hello” – R. Blackmon

 

Tip #2   Who Are You?

Do you know who you are? Most women or men get into relationships expecting it to complete and satisfy them; it’s sad to say, but most men and women enter into relationships as “broken pieces” whom expect the other to help heal and piece them together again. We tend to think “I’ll be okay, this relationship will make things alright, or I’ll be even happier if I was in a relationship. Getting to know who you are FIRST! will reveal things about yourself that you might didn’t even know. Once you discover who you truly are – then you’ll be able to identify those characteristics in a mate and determine whom you truly want to be with. You can’t know them, if you don’t know yourself.

Tip #3   Don’t allow your feelings to drive you to do something you’ll regret.

I’ve been on quite a few dating sites and if I can be honest, they’re all pretty much the same – you may have good intentions but everyone doesn’t follow that rule. Anyone can be whomever they wish or like to be on those sites. Singleness can cause us to do drastic things that lead to disastrous results. While some people have had good results; they don’t work for everyone, so be careful and don’t allow your lonely situation to kick you out of the drivers seat of your own life. Control It!

Tip #4   Focus on other things, instead of obsessing over it.

When you’re constantly looking for something, you never tend to find it but when you calm down and forget about it, then that’s when it seems to pop up out of nowhere. The same applies to singleness; when you stop looking for Mr. or Ms.’s Right and let it happen naturally, the unexpected miraculously happens out of the blue.

 

Good things not only comes to those who wait, but to those who least EXPECT IT! – R. Blackmon

 

Tip #5   Have you asked GOD Yet??

Have you consulted God about “Why you are Single?” – Okay, so before you decide to shut the page down and click the “x” sign, let me explain. This is a process that NO ONE wants to even ask God, because they’re afraid of the outcome or what he might say. “So, Lord? You want me to stay single for 5 more years?????? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Consulting God is best because he knows the true reason as to why you’re still alone. This answer is different and can be difficult for each individual. But I promise, if you consult God – then you’ll know what you need to work on in which could make Mr. or Ms. Right for  You come quicker. It’s almost like looking at your credit score, no one wants to face it but when you do, you realize that it wasn’t as bad as you thought and it’s a sort of a blueprint to help you get the things your truly desire. If you never work on it then you’ll never know what you could actually have.

Singleness is a crazy world all by itself; but you don’t have to lose your sanity during it. Remember, Singleness is not a death sentence and it doesn’t mean you should put your life on hold. Instead, it’s an opportunity for you to get in the driver’s seat and shape your own singleness destiny and let life handle the rest you might be really surprised at what it brings your way.

Stay Sane

SELF-HELP APRIL IS COMING!

Do you need help with an area in your life, or have questions about an on-going problem you are facing?
Well, Help is on the way!

For the whole month of April, I will be posting blogs giving advice on some of the questions that I’ve been asked to talk about. They are sort of “Self-Help” tips that will hopefully get you back on track to either living the life you want to live or give you a peace of mind as you continue to travel on your journey of self-discovery.  Listed below are the topics that will be discussed during the month:

Rejection sucks, BUT Life Doesn’t Have Too.

rejection

Rejection, Unfortunately is a word that no one likes to encounter. Rejection may be a bad word, but it doesn’t have to be a death sentence. I will give you a couple of tips to endure it.

5 Things Women Must Give Up to Get The Man of Their Dreams

guys-hate-nagging-women
We all have issues, men and women alike. But if you are having trouble obtaining or keeping a relationship because of “issues” then I will give you 5 tips that maybe you are doing that’s keeping you from having a healthy relationship.

BEING A FRIEND TO HAVE FRIENDS

ELEPHANT

In order to gain friends, you must first be friendly. Finding a friend that you can relate too is difficult, but what if your attitude is the determining factor in you not having the friendships you so desire. I’ll share my story and give you a couple of tips that will hopefully allow you to open the door and began to let people in.

How to remain “SANE” in Singleness

Stay Sane2

Being single can sometimes be a drab, Most singles waste their good energy on trying to find Mr or Mrs. Right – someone in hopes that will complete them, but no matter how hard we try to find that “perfect mate” We must first be in a good place ourselves. I’ll give you a couple of “Do’s and Don’t s” to keep you calm in the process.

So, be on the lookout every Thursday morning in the month of April for a Self-Help Blog Post.    Please feel free to share and comment.

Because Self-Help is definitely the BEST HELP!  
If you’ve been following me on Facebook, then you’ll know for the month of January and February we were doing a study on the names of God. Well, If you missed any of it – NO WORRIES!, I have a booklet that I created for you. If you would like a copy, please send me your request to justsuminspiration@gmail.com and I’ll send you a copy.
Talk Soon!
Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of JustsumInspiration