Reflection: The Number 4 & It’s Celebratory Moment In My Life

Featured Image above: by The Lazy Artist Gallery from Pexels

Ahhhh, or I guess I should say “WOOSAH” Where in the world do I start. Ever since I beat out shyness at the age of 30 (Yeah, late bloomer here), I’ve really never been at a loss for words but for some reason when it came down to reflect on the number 4 and 40, you’ll find out those meanings in a sec. I honestly didn’t know where to start, what to really say or if I should just skip this week and not post at all…

I have to admit, I’m usually prepared and have things scheduled, but this post is literally coming at you word-for-word as I sit at my computer and type away. Well, here it goes…

So the number 4 and 40 are celebratory because the number 4 represents a hurdle crossed that I didn’t think would last a month, less known a year. The number 40 represents the turn of a century that I honestly didn’t think I’d live to see. Without further ado, let’s begin with the number 4 in which all started in March when I got this beautiful notification from WordPress:

Happy Anniversary with WordPress.com! You registered on WordPress.com 4 years ago. Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging.

I mean, has it been 4 years already?? – Geesh, where has the time gone? I remember the month and day that I started this blog. It’s amazing because months prior I was beginning to wonder, what in the world my purpose/gift was. You know there’s a time in all of our lives where you want to become more strategic with your purpose and you begin to put more thought into what you’re doing and how what you’re doing is affecting the people around you. I had no idea what my true purpose was, I did in a sense but I hadn’t began to really cultivate it.


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Mind you, I’ve always been known as the “jack of all trades.” I could tell you how to do anything but I wasn’t a master at any of it. At one point I felt as if I was just put here on earth to just fly with the wind but deep inside I knew something more was there – people would look at me and the only thing I would get was “There’s something about you, I just can’t put my finger on it” In any case this could be good or bad, depending on how you look at it…lol.

However, In my spirit, I felt as if I should be doing more as if whatever it was I was doing, was nothing compared to what I should’ve been doing – if any of that even makes sense. As I scrolled through my email one day I saw the advertisement for WordPress and starting a blog, as soon as I see that advertisement – something in my spirit jumped as if to say “THAT’S IT!” needless to say, I didn’t take the bait and waited another 6 months in which I see the same advertisement and again, my spirit leaped and again, I didn’t do it. March 13, 2015 – there it was again except this time, the feeling I felt was forceful as if I was in labor and the baby was coming…whether I was ready for it or not.


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I felt something deep inside me say “DO IT NOW!!” and I did it, right then and there. I was hesitant about paying for my domain name, choking up the excuse of “I didn’t have the money” I learned a lesson from that experience and through it – I birthed my first blog post on this site entitled “Invest in Yourself……First!” and the rest as the old adage says “is history” I had no idea what I was going to talk about or even if this blog would last. Sometimes I can be an “it’s new” type of gal and once I get bored, It’s thrown to the side with other unfinished projects. I have to say, I acknowledged God every step of the way and 4 years later, here I am and I’m so grateful for the love, the support and the followers new and old who have stuck with me throughout this time.

I know there’s people out there that read the blog and never like or leave a comment but they read it and I’m even more grateful for that support as well because there’s a lot of things out here that could get your attention but to give me 5% of it, I count it an honor and I’m humbled. If we never meet or speak to each other, know that I feel the love.


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SOOOOOOOOOOO……that’s that, now you might be thinking, what’s up with the 40! Well, that’s how old I’ll be turning on tomorrow! I’m nervous, scared, disappointed, happy and optimistic all at the same time. Not sure if you can have all those arrays of emotions going on but I certainly do.

My doctor told me earlier this week that his friend told him that his 40’s were his best decade ever and I’m soooo holding on to that. There are so many things I can say about going into 40. I’ve experienced a lot of ups as well as downs getting to this point and I’ve made some terrible mistakes but I’m going into 40 with a little more wisdom and a lot of more love for myself. It’s sad because if I can be honest, I messed up my 20’s and most of my 30’s and even though, by 30, I’d finally discovered my voice. I had trouble using it and continuously welcomed, unacceptable behavior in the terms of “toxic” relationships.

Over that period, I’d gained many friends and lost just as many. Some for no apparent reason at all – I just happened to look around and realized they were no longer there. Some instances of that happening hurt like hell (pardon the language) and in other circumstances, I was glad for the departure. I’ve learned a lot getting to this point and it’s true what they say, the older you get you tend to become less worried about what people think, what people say and how people view you. I now realize my worth and KNOW who I am. I’m no longer hungry for love, attention or friendships. I allow things to happen organically now, which in my opinion – is best.


Photo by Godisable Jacob from Pexels

The one thing I’m looking forward to in my 40’s is my kids graduating high school and completing college if I should still be writing at 50 and if their heads are screwed on right (fingers crossed) They’d be done accomplished both by the time I reach the end of my 40’s. So it’ll be cool to see what my reflections I write at that time for sure.

Going into 40 while I’m working on my emotions towards it. One emotion I’m sure of and that’s the bittersweet moments. (Okay, the flood gates are about to swing wide open..) I miss my mother dearly. Every year, no matter what age I turned, she would always have her “mother-daughter” coming of age talk with me. My mother had experienced it all and seen it all so she was destined to tell me every year what the new age would hold for me and how I should conduct myself as a lady. It was her thing and I loved it. Every time I would get ready to turn an age, I would ask “Okay, mama when do I need to schedule my talk with you” – haha. If she was here I would have gotten my birthday present in February….lol lol. She always gave birthday gifts EXTRA early.

It’s funny because I wonder what wisdom she’d share with me in regards to the 40’s, I would give anything to have at least 15 min with her – but mama’s gone now…

Please help me say “WHOOSAH!!”


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Moving Forward >>>

You know Life is unexpected and while living it – you’ll have your many ups, downs and coming out of nowhere situations but guess what – you just have to live it, make the best of whatever it throws at you and celebrate every…single…moment! I mean, every one of them, no matter how big or how small. Because we only are guaranteed one shot, some are lucky and get more – but you have to live it as if ONE is all you have and will ever get.

Embrace it, Cherish it, Hug, Love, Kiss and CELEBRATE!

I don’t know what this next phase will hold. I’m sure like with everything else, there will be many ups and of course some low downs but I’m praying for bigger and better accomplishments, I plan to continue to be on the grind and crush goals. I plan to produce one, two or more books to be published – prayerfully from a traditional publisher. Build my business (RoBCreative), raise these teenagers into something great (again, fingers crossed) and LOVE, give back and invest. I think love has finally found me, maybe i’ll be able to write about that someday.

Whatever comes and whatever goes, I’m standing with open arms ready to embrace it and like my doctor said, maybe the 40’s will truly be my best decade starting tomorrow and to infinity and beyond….I’M READY.


Photo by nappy from Pexels

If you made it to the end of this post, Thanks for sticking around, I truly winged this one ; )

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What has the World Done to Us? And, Why Am I Crying About It!

There’s a saying that says, “One Bad Apple, spoils it for the Rest” and the older I’m getting, I’m finding that statement to be even the more sadder by the minute, hour and day.

The World is a Cruel place.

Now I know what you may be thinking, “Okay, whose peed in my cheerios” Well, it’s not about “Who” but “What” – While the world is cruel and evil and sometimes (okay most times) unforgiving. There are still quite a few people in it, that are cool, personable and have a way of turning any blue day into a shiny one, just by their personality alone. I happen to be one of those people…

Recently, I put a couple of things online to sell. I posted these items across the yard sale boards and I tell you, I have never, ever in my life received so many responses. I mean, I couldn’t finish answering one question before I could answer another one. It became SOOO overwhelming, I began telling people that certain items had sold – just to calm down my inbox. It was then that I understood why celebrities have designated people either checking their emails or handling their social media handles. I guess you can say that experience was my 15 min of fame as I surely thought I had become one, OVERNIGHT!!

Image credit: The Edge

I was successful in getting certain things sold but after a couple of failed promised deals gone bad – I decided to go down the list to other people interested. What I noticed is that although I had stated in my post that there would be “NO DELIVERIES” I had quite a few people whom opted that I meet them in a public place, a common area where a lot of people are. I did this for one person but when it came to the other person wanting me to do the same thing, I felt a little disheartened.

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They were interested in an item I had but clearly stated that their circumstances would keep them from meeting me as they don’t do anything or go anywhere, especially to someone’s house without their spouse tagging along. They went on to mention that if they did meet me without their better half, it would have to be at a police station and because their spouse would be unavailable. They asked to be passed over for the items and that I move on to the next person.

In that moment, I felt some type of way, I felt dehumanized – if that makes sense. I suddenly thought – the world is a cruel place indeed; it’s been crippled by so much FEAR.

Thinking about the response from that individual suddenly made me cry. I admit, sometimes I can be a very emotional person, depending on the situation and especially during a good chick flick; pass the tissues because this girl will be crying. I mean, that’s just me.

Image Credit: Pexels

Now, I know my actions to that situation doesn’t make a lick of sense to you and if I can be honest, it really didn’t to me either, like “Why was I crying??” I felt sad because of ALL the negativity, scams, killings and so forth in the world, nobody can be trusted!! The first thing I thought was, “I wouldn’t hurt anyone” I remember crying one day because I’d accidently run over a dog, who came bustling out in the road from nowhere it seems.

I believe I cried too because I KNOW what type of person I am, but just because I KNOW, doesn’t mean that someone else does and you can’t be too careful these days, not even a little bit. People that speak nicely on the phone or appear nice, can easily turn out to be a terror in disguise, the only thing they need or seem to look for is an open heart to let them in and the next thing you know, your world, is turned upside-down. “Can’t people just be Good??, I mean, can we just have Good people, who want to do GOOD things and NOT bring hurt or harm to anyone? Can’t we just have GOOD PEOPLE? Are there NOT enough good people in the world??

While I was having an emotional moment of silence to myself. There was a little voice on the inside of me that said, “You Keep Being Good, no matter what, just keep being YOU!” It’s amazing how something so small can change our mindset about life and question who we really are.

I said all of that to say, Yes, while the world seems to be going to HELL in a hand-basket. There’s still some good and good people left in it. There are still organizations, companies and non-profits whom are changing the world – even if just for one person.

You can’t make people see the good in you, especially over the phone or thru a message board…lol, and please don’t try to make them. All you can do is just BE YOU. If you’re good, continue being good and don’t let anyone dull your shine, no matter how NEGATIVE the world may continue to get.

Do not be overcome by evil but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:21 (NIV)

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The Moment I Grew Up & Started Putting My Foot Down.

Okay, let’s get honest here…

Being a grown-up can REALLY suck!

Image credit: Bing

I’m saying that in jest but it can. I have been an official grown-up for nearly 22 years and at times I have wished that I can just run into one of my parents’ arms and stay there forever enjoying the protection. It just feels so good!

But any wise person would tell you permanently staying in that position isn’t possible. After a brief consoling period both of my parents would say “Welcome to adulthood”. And that folks is it in a nutshell…

Image credit: Pexels

If you’re 20 or older, welcome to adulthood! It’s going to be quite the bumpy ride so grab a hold of something and hang on tight! as it’s not going to get any easier as you get older either. I was raised in the typical middle class lifestyle. Mom and Dad are truly the best parents anyone could ever ask for. I have truly been blessed.

As those of you who have read my previous blogs may know, I have a learning disability and have dealt with my fair share of discrimination and rejection. I have wasted way too much time trying to understand why having learning disability can be considered such a black mark but it is. However, I’ve learned to just keep plowing through.

One of the most memorable experiences I’ve had as an adult was coming to the realization when it’s time to let something go. As I’ve mentioned previously, I have been self-employed in the dog care field for the past 12 years.

I’ve been tested on numerous occasions in reference to “letting go”. I remember I had this one client in the beginning of my career, who was VERY particular. They had a Boston Terrier who was older and they hired me to care for her.

It was the easiest job! She wasn’t a picky dog unlike her owners! Quite frankly, these two could have learned a lot from her! Unfortunately she passed away last June and to be perfectly honest -as much as I missed her. I was happy not to be working for her owners anymore…..but that happy thought was short-lived.

A few months later, they got another Boston Terrier – 3 months old.

Gif Image Credit: Bing

To make a very long story short, I was pretty much in charge of caring for him while they worked and did whatever else they wanted to do. One time they left him with me for a full 4 hours!! Did I mention that this was on the first day? The hours were brutal and quite frankly, ridiculous! as this charade went on for quite some time..

It would’ve been different if they were my only clients, but they weren’t. I had other clients who also needed my attention. It was then that I decided that enough was enough. Finally, I put my foot down and explained to them that their “rigorous” schedule could not continue. An agreement was finally made by all parties.

The Epiphany of me putting my foot down came when I realized that this puppy was becoming too much for me to handle on my own. It all started when he and I
were walking around the retirement community, when he go loose somehow
and boy did he GO WILD! I’m still recovering from very sore legs after chasing him!

There I was, a 40-something year old woman, trying to run after a 7 month old puppy. Oh my poor legs! After that day, I came to a very hurtful conclusion “I cannot take care of puppies anymore, at least not on my own. It would be a completely different story if I were 10, 15 or even 20 years younger but unfortunately, that boat has sailed on into the abyss.

Image credit: Bing

So, basically the moral of the story is, I’ve gotten older and there’s just some things that I can’t do anymore like taking care of a hyper-active puppy. It doesn’t suck to confess that I am older. I mean, it is what it is.

On that note, getting older also means getting wiser. I’ve learned that I must put my foot down more and not agree and say YES to everything. In fact, none of us should. You are the only one in control… well, up to a point. God has the final say in all things.

The best advice I can give at this moment is to listen to your gut. It won’t steer you wrong. I should have listened to my gut when I first saw that puppy…

Don’t be afraid to stand your ground and if someone doesn’t like it…

Tell them GOOD-BYE!

———————————————————————–

Amy is a resident of Florida.  Since 2006, she has been self-employed in the dog care field.  In May 2017, she self-published a memoir titled “I Am Not Stupid” which is available through Amazon.  She writes for seethegoodinfo, an inspirational website and the Learning Disabilities Association’s newsletter LD Source.

Amy is a resident of Florida.  Since 2006, she has been self-employed in the dog care field.  In May 2017, she self-published a memoir titled “I Am Not Stupid” which is available through Amazon.  She writes for seethegoodinfo, an inspirational website and the Learning Disabilities Association’s newsletter LD Source.

Monthly Series: An Attitude of Gratitude – Challenge #7

photo above courtesy of etsy.com

Happy Monday Inspiration! and welcome to the fourth and last week of our Monthly series – Attitude of Gratitude. I do hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving!!. Just in case you missed the November Vibes post, Every Monday and Wednesday for the month of November, I will be posting questions in regards to being grateful. I will answer these questions myself but my hope is that you will answer them too and leave those answers in the comment section.

Some questions may have us digging a little deeper within ourselves to answer them, but in the end – my hope is that you will feel more empowered and begin to see yourself and even your life differently and not just for the month of November – but for every month of the year. You can choose to start a journal if you want but this challenge as you may say, is not just about us writing things out and leaving it in a little book to store it away and go back to it when we’re reflecting on our life but the challenge is to show it!! so as an extra bonus after every question regarding yourself will be a question in which will relate to the world around you, it’ll be called “Our End of the Day Question” – you don’t have to write about it here, but it’ll be something that you’ll just ask yourself everyday at the end of your day. While writing out what we’re “grateful” for is half the battle, showing gratitude for and towards others is the KEY!

So, let’s do both – reflecting and showing….(by the way, the passage above will be in every challenge post to start off, however; a new question will be at the bottom of each post).

Today's Challenge Question is.... (3)

What is your TOP goal and why are you grateful for it (My response)

I would say that my TOP goal is to continue to go hard in exercise and stay healthy. Over the course of the last couple of months (late August), I’ve been on the “Girl, Get your Self Together” movement…lol. It was hard at first because as most of you know, when you go a long time without exercising – it’s a killer once you start back but if you keep at it, you’ll eventually begin to not only see results but improve your strength and overall thinking about your body and the things you put in it. We only get one body and therefore we have to treat it as our temple, not our trashcan.

I’ve also been doing/going to a group class called burn boot camp, trust me when you hear the word “boot camp” I know it makes you cringe because you know your body is going to be pushed to its limits. But I took the challenge and have been doing it thus far, faithfully everyday at 5:30am. It’s motivating to be around other people of all shapes and sizes, whom have the same goal as you “To Get Healthy.” It’s truly been a life changer for me and I absolutely love it. I realize that working out is a lifestyle change as I’m not doing it to fit into a certain garment or to attend a special event to show people or exes what they’ve missed but I’m doing it because I want to be healthy and I want to be able to have energy to do things with my two kids, so I do it strictly for me. I’m just grateful to be able to have the mind to want to get healthy and the will to actually do it.

Now It's Your Turn

– What is your TOP goal and why are you grateful for it; Comment Below –

Your End of the Day Question:

How many of your friends would you trust with my life?

 

Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager

Let’s Live Well, Laugh Loud, Inspire More & Love Harder!

Monthly Series: An Attitude of Gratitude – Challenge #5

Happy Monday! and welcome to the third week of our Monthly series – Attitude of Gratitude. Just in case you missed the November Vibes post, Every Monday and Wednesday for the month of November, I will be posting questions in regards to being grateful. I will answer these questions myself but my hope is that you will answer them too and leave those answers in the comment section.

Some questions may have us digging a little deeper within ourselves to answer them, but in the end – my hope is that you will feel more empowered and begin to see yourself and even your life differently and not just for the month of November – but for every month of the year. You can choose to start a journal if you want but this challenge as you may say, is not just about us writing things out and leaving it in a little book to store it away and go back to it when we’re reflecting on our life but the challenge is to show it!! so as an extra bonus after every question regarding yourself will be a question in which will relate to the world around you, it’ll be called “Our End of the Day Question” – you don’t have to write about it here, but it’ll be something that you’ll just ask yourself everyday at the end of your day. While writing out what we’re “grateful” for is half the battle, showing gratitude for and towards others is the KEY!

So, let’s do both – reflecting and showing….(by the way, the passage above will be in every challenge post to start off, however; a new question will be at the bottom of each post).

Today's Challenge Question is.... (4)

Describe the last time your heart was overflowing with JOY! (My response)

Last year about this time, I had just gotten a new car – BUT! it was a frustrating experience prior to that point, while the beginning was frustrating and had me crying a many nights, the ending was so sweet and I knew that in the end GOD definitely DID IT! so here’s a short version of the story: I was living in a very nice place, probably one of the best places I’d ever lived in since being out on my own. The rooms were huge and there was enough room to move around without bumping into someone; however, those good times came to an end when I got a letter on the door stating that I had to move out, unfortunately the landlord didn’t take the money I paid him, to pay the mortgage on the place (this had been going on for quite some time without me knowing it) and the house was getting foreclosed on; I was devastated, hurt and wondering where in the world were me and my kids going to go?? In the process of moving, I got behind on my car payments although I did try to call and make arrangements but that went unnoticed; I woke up that Saturday morning to find my car gone, it had been repossessed and the kicker in all of that was – I was going to start a new job that following Monday!

How was I going to get to work?? Thank God for cool friends and a wonderful sister whom let me use her car for 2 weeks, putting her active family down to one car. I went everywhere trying to get a car and everyone denied me, I was so hurt and had reached my wits end until my mom mentioned a car dealership that I had not tried; thinking things were going to be the same verbatim conversation as the other dealers, I didn’t put much hope nor thought into the gentlemen that was asking me for the same exact information I had given everyone else. “I can get you a car,” he said….But that’s what everyone else had said too and to no avail, I had to get a ride back home. So as I waited impatiently on him to add up the numbers and submit the information, that feeling of defeat turned into a praise when I heard him come back and say, “Ma’am, YOU’RE APPROVED!!!!

Now It's Your Turn

– Describe the last time your heart was filled with Joy!; Comment Below –

Your End of the Day Question:

What resources do you have in your life right now, that you know someone else doesn’t have. You can’t save the whole world; but think of how you could help give at least one of those resources to someone in need. (food, warmth etc.)

 

Roshonda N. Blackmon – Creator of A Blog, A Magazine. It’s JustsumInspiration, Author, Speaker & Encourager

Let’s Live Well, Laugh Loud, Inspire More & Love Harder!