Sunday’s Thought: When You Give More, Receive Less & Pout About It!

The pictures above and below courtesy of pexels and bing

Did I tell you that last week I woke up in the middle of the night, crying my eyeballs out! I was so emotional and for some reason or another, that week just seemed to be a rollercoaster ride of them all because I was feeling some type a way about something that I honestly couldn’t control – ever been there??

Going to work the following day, no one would’ve even guessed or imagined that I had that bout of sadness, I guess it’s because I’m so used to trying to be the smile or the light for others to see – but what happens when I need a smile or a light and no one’s there to give it back to me – What happens when I, HOLD UP – let me capitalize it “EXPECT” people to do things for me because I loyal in doing something for them; is it wrong for me to expect that same loyalty back in return? What happens when I don’t get it?

Have u ever went above and beyond to do good for someone, but found yourself not getting that same dedication back in return?

Let me just say, I’ve been there more times than I’d like to admit and I found myself literally having a pity party over it – I wanted people to put the same heart, time and effort into doing for me, as I did for them. However; my hopes, dreams, and fantasies of wanting this to be so, was NOT so!

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There’s a scripture in the bible that says “”Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you.”  Matthew 7:12 (NLT). I can’t tell you how long I’ve misunderstood this verse, because in my mind – I was doing for others with the anticipation that they would and should ((let me be transparent and honest here)) do to ME! I mean, look at what I was doing or had done for them.

But, God gave me a revelation of that scripture in my “pouty” breakdown that night and it goes like this: Do for others, the way you yourself would like to be treated and handled; be the light! That’s how you must conduct your business when it comes to someone else, does that make sense? It’s not about what people can do for you in return because of what you did for them; it’s more about “how” you would like to overall see people treated because in doing so, we’re actually displaying Gods love in which was a FREE for all who wanted it.

I mean, look at it this way…..

Jesus had 12 disciples who were supposed to have his back, right? Just because they were walking with someone who was perfect, didn’t mean that they were. They all let Jesus down “BIG” time!! Peter loved him and denied him, so much so he went into a cursing fit. Judas betrayed him and felt bad later, so much so – he hung himself. Matthew was a cheater and no telling what hurts, habits and hang-ups the others had (you know everything wasn’t written in scripture) and you know the saddest thing of it all??- when Jesus needed them the most they slept on him.  Here he was in the garden of Gethsemane balling his eyes out and sweating up a storm because he knew he was about to die. I can only imagine the pain he must’ve been feeling at that time – the agony, the factor of just wanting someone to comfort him and no one was available, even after all the things he had done, the people he had helped and the miracles he had performed; in the end when he needed someone the most, no one was there but his heavenly father.

Does this remind you of some of the people you deal with today? Friends, Family, co-workers, acquaintances and so forth. So you might ask, well what does all of this mean? It means that everyone’s NOT going to be there for us or have our backs – if Jesus experienced it and got over it, so can WE!

My mother used to say “It’s not what they do to you – It’s what you do to THEM! – Greater is he that’s within us than he that’s within the world. 1 John 4:4. I don’t know if you’ve experienced any of this before but I just want you to know that even in my dreadful moments; God was there and he dried my tears away. I know it’s hard sometimes to think on the “positive” side when you’re feeling down – but when God brought to my mind what he had been through, with his own friends. It made me realize that I wasn’t alone.

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I reached out to my friend and she shared a powerful message with me – Read it and use it to step over the pouting and crying hurdles in your life – Use it to help move you ahead and continue treating people the way “God” intends for us to treat them, no matter what and that’s with great, deep-seated, unjudging (((( LOVE )))) 

My Friend Shanae’s text message is below but first (a little backstory as to why I texted her) The pouty night I had was a result over the concerns I had with my new faith-based book “Billy Wolf and the Kids of Heavenly Hills Elementary” and how people weren’t responding as I thought they should’ve, people (a.k.a friends) that I thought would have my back and buy the book, didn’t. I also had concerns about the people that purchased the book, people whom I asked to leave a positive review after reading it but they didn’t leave a review at all, even to this day. Afterwhile, my emotions took over and I began to think that maybe I wrote a horrible book that people really hated but was too afraid to tell me!!!

Suddenly, the feel-good emotion I had with writing it became feelings of insecurity and regret, I began to doubt myself and wanted to pull the book from the shelf. So, I texted Shanae and asked: “Sis tell me the truth, Is my book bad??”  and this is what she wrote back: 

“Yes, I understand how frustrating that is. Especially when you think people are going to support in a certain way. I’ve learned that many people will get the book but never read it. Buying it is their way of supporting. And yes, its super difficult to get people to actually read it because that requires them to slow down and focus on something other than their own stuff. Don’t stress yourself out over the reviews or getting people to read it. God has blessed you with this work and those that are called to read and review will do it without the hassle. Try not to harbor any animosity toward them and stop asking. Forgive them if they never do it and move forward with your promo etc. Your book is great and those that read it will be blessed greatly.”

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No matter what gift or dream you have. Don’t give up on it – Sometimes you’ll hear crickets before you hear an applause. Keep doing what you’re doing – IT REALLY IS GOOD! Take it from ME! – â¤ï¸

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Bully, Bully, Bully! – October’s Month of Prevention

 

All pictures, whether above or below are courtesy of bing and pexels

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Hello Friends! Did you know that out of the 116 events October has going on this month – there’s one that tugs at my heart and that’s  “National Bullying Prevention Month” in which was created by PACER a National Bullying Prevention Center in 2006.  I would encourage you to visit the site as they have a lot of cool stuff going on and you’ll also be able to sign the PLEDGE which is a commitment to support and help others whom are feeling excluded or have been the target of bullying. I signed mine, will you take the pledge today? The color for bullying prevention is orange, so make sure you rock out some orange this month and not just for Halloween…LOL LOL!

Related Post: I Bet You Didn’t Know This – October is FULL of It!

When I was in school, I was bullied all the time – whether it was regarding my hairstyle, my dark skin, my quietness, the way I talked or how I dressed (in which I wore dresses all the time) I always felt like the target for something – I hated it – It was always when, I’d be sitting all by myself, not bothering anybody and just happen to look up and see a couple of girls or guys looking back at me – laughing and pointing because of the way I was eating my food or the constant stares I would get when I would walk by a group of girls and they would look me up and down and laugh because maybe I didn’t have on the latest shoes or clothes.

It was a period in which if I had a wand; I would’ve made it all go away. But I didn’t have a wand, so, therefore, I had to face it – ALONE!

When I got into the 9th grade; study hall was a place in which I dreaded to go. There was this guy in there who found a way to pick on me all the time and not only did he do it, but he acclaimed the attention of everyone else around him and they did it too. There would be such nonsense as, “Hey, Hey Girl” and when I would ignore him, he would call me the B word. When I would look over, he would say “Hey, this boy said he like you and then I had to suffer with the guy saying “I don’t like that ugly girl” and everyone would laugh and it would go on and on and on and on…the hour and a half couldn’t come fast enough, but for some reason it seemed to drag along as if it were enjoying me getting taunted too.

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I had no friends and I dare not tell my mom what was going on, she had other things she had to deal with such as taking care of me and my two siblings alone. There were many dealings I’ve had with bullying, such as getting ganged up by a group of girls after school, to getting slapped by a boy so hard; until I never thought I would be able to see straight again; it wasn’t like I did anything to cause this – the cause of this was me doing nothing at all, just minding my own business – these things and many others like it was so detrimental, I literally wanted to take my life and almost did (something I never shared with anyone). I say all of this to say, bullying is not only mean but it’s an issue that if not dealt with, can leave you helpless in thinking that you’re alone and no one cares for you or about you. “Man, I wish I was pretty” I would always tell myself because everyone around me said that I wasn’t – this stigma followed me until I got into my early 30’s (to this day, I still have trouble actually looking at myself in a mirror).

Related Post: How To Remain “Positive” In A Negative Environment

My purpose for writing “Billy Wolf and the Kids of Heavenly Hills Elementary” is to tell the story of the many bullies we have walking around today – but, we can’t face them alone. We need more than one person to stand up, we need a nation. People that will not only sit back, laugh, post to social media and watch while others are being humiliated and degraded but people whose had enough and are willing to take a stand and help those being bullied; we need people who want to see CHANGE!

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We’ve lost too many young people and adults as well to this growing epidemic – I was almost one of them. I didn’t realize how important my voice was until I began to use it – you have a voice; use it to regain your power even if you have to go the news – make your voice heard!! Let’s take care of each other, people can’t help the way they were raised or maybe what they were taught – let’s treat everyone as an equal; let’s stand up and make our voice heard; especially to the ones who have not yet found their inner voice, to speak out.

Let’s Take A Stand Against Bullying – Let’s SPEAK UP!!

Together We Can Do This!!

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Weekly Announcements!!

Guess What!!!! She’s BACCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK! Who you say??? AMY TEMPLE!! – For the last two Tuesdays of this month, you’ll get a chance to hear from Amy again and let me just say, she got a couple of posts ready and “You’re going to be truly “ENSPIRED” – In the meantime, check out her latest post “I AM NOT STUPID!

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Being that this is “Bullying Prevention Month” – Did you know that, that’s what my new faith-based book is all about? Adults, as well as children, can get something from it as we all have faced it in our own lives at one time or the other.

Check out this latest review from an adult/with no children whom found an interest in the book and gathered her own thoughts from it. I promise I’m not paying these people (Girl Scouts, honor =)

“I thoroughly enjoyed the book “Billy Wolf & The Kids of Heavenly Hills Elementary”. In a day like today, lots of kids deal with bullying. I loved how it encourages kids to stand up for good and be the one to make a change. It also gives the perspective of the bully’s life as a lot of times these children are dealing with bad situations and environments, and need help themselves. The book would be a good gift to kids and their parents to have open discussions and dialogues.” Tasha V. 

Will your Review be the Next Featured?

“Billy Wolf & The Kids of Heavenly Hills Elementary”

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Now available through these major online book outlets

Books-A-Million

Barnes and Nobles 

Amazon

Purchase your copy Today!!!

How To Remain “Positive” In A Negative Environment

The photo above and all others below courtesy of pexels.com

In Lieu of October – I thought I’d write about “Positivity” – did you know that October was Positive Attitude Month? Uh, Yeah – it really is….in which is something we should all have regardless of the month, correct?

But not so, sometimes it’s extremely hard to keep up a “positive” image and smile in the midst of chaos or adversity and it’s even harder to always try to search for that glimmer of light in the midst of so much darkness – but guess what! You really can…

Related Post: I Bet You Didn’t Know This – October is FULL of It!

When you go into a dark room and cut on the light, it makes everything within that room visible. Light has a way of shining on the darkest situations and circumstances especially if someone is having a bad day or if things aren’t quite looking UP as we sometimes would hope or think. Darkness is allowed in some cases such as when nightfall comes, that’s a darkness that is a must because after the sun has done it’s days work and sets in the evening, darkness comes to take over its shift, to allow people to retire for the night and rest but that’s how our solar system works.

So, what about the light and darkness we hold on the inside of us? You see, we all carry a light bulb within us and no matter how our day may go or play out, we have a sure responsibility to handle that day appropriately. We have the ability to turn our light on or leave it dark; it’s a choice that can only be made by you, whether to let positive rule the day or allow negativity to destroy it.

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I’ve been told that I’m a very positive person and have had people to come to me when they either want to smile, talk or need to be uplifted from a dreadful day. So I share the light that’s on the inside of me with them. But, sometimes after I’ve given out so much light, there comes a time when my light gets dim and even dark sometimes.

That’s one of the downfalls to being an encourager – you’re the one that people call when they need to be lifted or consoled or just want to vent. But when it’s your time, you hear crickets! I guess that’s just the way the cookie crumbles…..

However; Listed below are a couple of strategies that help me and maybe can help you too when your positive light suddenly stop working or begin to go dim.

 PRAY!

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Now, I don’t know your religious affiliation and that’s okay, but when people are mean or have said something to me or about me that’s untrue and has totally shifted my light from bright to dark – Prayer is the first step I take. It’s a meditation route that not only relaxes your mind but calms your spirit; it brings you back into focus and allows you to think before you speak and say something that will dim someone else’s light.

TALK TO SOMEONE

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Another way to stay positive is by talking with someone else who has a positive mindset. I can’t tell you how many times, I’ve felt down in the dumps only to talk to someone to vent and they start talking about their negativity. Choose your circle of friends wisely, because if you don’t have anyone that is able to listen to you or be there when you need a re-charge, then you might need to regroup and think about your circle. You’re there for everyone else, make sure you have someone that can be there for you too.

AVOID NEGATIVE NEWS

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I almost can’t tell you how dreadful it is to turn on the news and see negative things – It’s not only depressing but discouraging. Not to be naïve’ to the news or the things that are currently going on in the world today but there are times when you need a break. That’s when I turn on some positive tunes on the radio or pop in a CD and sing. Reading positive things and/or positive quotes are also re-chargers to having a positive day.

 DON’T CHANGE YOUR STRIPES

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If you are a naturally positive person, don’t change who you are all because someone else chose to not turn their light on and have a bad day. Everyone is not going to be positive and smile like you do, but that shouldn’t stop you from being who you are when you change to accommodate a negative energy it makes you negative. People are People and everyone is definitely different – But don’t allow their difference to keep you from making a positive difference in your life and the world.

8iEbknAyTIt’s not easy sometimes to maintain a positive disposition in a negative world; but if you keep your focus and remain true to yourself, you will have a light that will continue to shine inside of you and just may serve as the source for helping to turn someone else’s on too.

 

“LOOK UP, LOOK AROUND AND LOOK WITHIN, BECAUSE THERE REALLY IS POSITIVITY IN EVERYTHING” – BY YOURS TRULY

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Weekly Announcements! – Book Review Time…

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Sadly, bullying continues to plague our society, especially our children. This book shows the effects of bullying in one school and even offers a glimpse into the life of the bully. It reminds us that our behaviors have consequences and that with God we are strong. It also reminds us that God loves us, wants us to love each other and is willing to forgive us when we don’t treat others with love. The story could serve as a great conversation starter for parents to talk to their children about bullying—how/why not to be a bully and what to do if they are on the receiving end of such behavior. At the end of the book, there is a list of resources, as well as a beautiful prayer for the bullies, the bullied and the families of those impacted by bullying.

Jacqueline M.  University Contract Manager, Retired School Teacher

Will your Review be the Next Featured?

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“Billy Wolf & The Kids of Heavenly Hills Elementary”

Now available through these major online book outlets

Books-A-Million

Barnes and Nobles 

Amazon

Purchase your copy Today!!!