Being A Friend To Have Friends

You’ve heard the saying, “Life can give you Lemons” and that is very true; but what happens when you need to turn those lemons into lemonade and have no one there to help you do it. That’s where a true friend comes in at to help us navigate through life’s hits, boomerangs and punches. Finding a friend that you can relate too can be difficult and while this isn’t an easy feat, due to our different personalities, backgrounds, hurts, habits or hang-ups we all need someone to lean on when life throws us curve balls.

I never had friends growing up; I could remember maybe one or two in 5th or 6th grade but otherwise, I was mainly a loner. I wanted to hang with the popular kids, but wasn’t popular enough. I wanted to hang with the smart kids, but wasn’t smart enough. I wanted to hang with the pretty girls, but wasn’t pretty enough. Everywhere I looked; I wasn’t enough for anyone – not even the kids whom were just like me; thing is, they had at least one friend. I didn’t have any.

So I put up a wall which lead to resistance and anger. As I got older I began to acquire friends but noticed my attitude towards them was mean, harsh and downright rude. When they wanted to hang-out, I always found a way to bail out and when they wanted to talk; I found a way to dismiss them. What had I become? The girl who couldn’t get a friend because of how I looked and etc. was now the bully in a friendship. I treated those friends exactly how I had been treated. Past hurts and the negativity that stemmed from it was keeping me from obtaining the friendships I had once desired. So, if you truly desire to have friends or become friendlier, then listed below are four tips which will help you get over the hurdle of unfriendliness?

Tip #1: Forget the Past

Forget the Past

Most of the times the reason why we can’t move forward in life or relationships is because we are still stuck in the Past, thinking about what happened before or who did what and why only keeps you in a ‘negative’ state of mind. If you truly want to move forward you have to forgive your past and the people in it.

Tip #2: Tell Hurt – Goodbye!

Charlie Brown Goodbye

Another thing that keeps us in the past old wounds or previous HURT; that word alone keeps us from opening up to other experiences – I’ve heard people say ‘Once Hurt, Always Hurt’ and they hold on to that mantra throughout every relationship. Remember, hurt is an enemy and as long as you hold on to it, it will hold on to you.

Tip #3: Open up the Doors of your Heart

Open Heart

Once you decide to move forward, then you have to open up your heart again; this is not easy but it paves the way for new things to enter and old things to exit.

 Tip #4: At Least Try

try try again banner

Before you decide that you don’t want to deal with the anxieties of opening up to something new, at least give it a try. As the saying says, ‘If at first you don’t succeed, Try and Try Again! Sometimes the third, sixth or eighth time can truly be a charm.

The Bible says “A man who has friends must himself be friendly” (Prov. 18:24 NKJV); Starting today, determine to let go of whatever hurts you’re holding onto from the past and choose to be the kind of friend that you’d always wanted or desired for yourself, for someone else. I promise you’ll be glad you did and as you begin to open up – you’ll begin to see your life shape into something beautiful, something great and something positive. But only if you open up and allow it to seek new possibilities and relationships.

Elephant and Dog

Because Everyone Needs a Friend…

All Photo's Courtesy of Bing 

 

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Getting to Know All about You…

CAN WE HAVE A CUP OF TEA AND CHAT A MOMENT?…

You know when I was younger, I didn’t have any friends as a matter of fact; because I kept to myself people deemed me as the weird kid and stayed away from me. But when people did stop and talk to me; I noticed I had a voice – and a good ear for listening. My voice provided comfort, support, encouragement, upliftment  and my ears provided safety for their secrets and most precious thoughts. It was then that I discovered that while I may not had the outer beauty a physicality that I wanted so desperately to gain attention. I had something so much more beautiful on the inside of me. Something more precious than just being the cute girl next door….I had an encouraging voice.

Now I know that doesn’t sound like much, but we all have at least one thing about ourselves, one unique thing that makes us stand out in the crowd.

Encouragement was my gift. Do you know what your gift is?

In 2015 JustsumInspiration was born, I had finally accepted the call on my life to do what God had already equipped me to do and that is and always has been to encourage others. So, everything that’s placed on the justsuminspiration page was geared to do just that. But now that we are in 2017, almost 2yrs since the page was created; I now want to change things up and instead of writing all the time, now I want to hear from you. What are you facing in your life right now that you need help with, do you need a listening ear or do you have a question that you’ve been pondering and don’t know who to talk to? Well, JustsumInspiration is changing to be more than just a page that features pics, graphics and words……It’s now a place where you can talk to me and I talk to you, just think of it as having an extra friend to communicate with.

So you may message me through Facebook, or email me at justsuminspiration@gmail.com and I will answer your questions about God, Love, Marriage, Divorce, Being Single or even How to act on a job when your boss is acting crazy or just random things that you would like to talk about in general. These responses will be in video format (your name excluded, if you want) that will be posted on the justsuminspiration page. All that I don’t have answers for will be prayed about and researched. I want this page to be more than a place where you come and see words, but a place where you can come and feel comfortable with speaking what’s on your heart.

P.S. I am also thinking about sending out a monthly 7-day devotional, so if you would like a copy, please make sure you sign up on the popup link on the justsuminspiration page with your email address to receive yours or other notifications regarding the site itself.

P.S.S. I’m sure most of you noticed that I didn’t post anything for the month of December, Well since my last post on 11/23/16 and 11/11/16. My mom’s health had declined, she passed away on 11/29. So the month of December was hard for me in that respect, I cherished; loved and adored my mom so much. When I’m able, I will do a post concerning that situation but I can’t bring myself to do it right now. Please keep me and my family in your prayers.

So I appreciate your patience as I make a couple of changes to the site and the Facebook Page & Stay Tuned for more inspiring content!!

Sincerely,

Roshonda N. Blackmon – Author & Creator of JustsumInspiration.com